little girl l BIG VOICE

Humanity's Top 10 Bucket List...Now Where's David Letterman

2008-10-20T16:24:00.003-04:00

Coming back from vacation is always a bittersweet phenomenon for me. It’s concurrently depressing and a relief. I’m always longing to be back in the middle of the trip, without a care in the world, yet itching to get everything that’s piled up in my absence taken care of. So Saturday morning turned into a bit of a roller-coaster ride, as I disembarked from a seven day cruise through Mexico aboard The Norwegian Star—my ocean liner of a home away from home—and made my way to LAX.

I won’t lie. I struggled with giving up my Blackberry for eight glorious days. But I also reveled in ditching said Crackberry in the stateroom safe. I both loved and hated not keeping any sort of schedule. I was delighted, yet insecure about being able to sleep in past 5 a.m. (the first few mornings, upon waking au natural et sans alarm, I panicked, thinking I had somehow slept through my alarm and was now disastrously late).

But mostly, I have arrived back in the states with a simmering sense of guilt about being in the social position to receive such an opportunity—to be waited on, hand and foot. My time in Mexico was exhilarating, but concerning as well. It’s just not fair that some of us get to jet-set around, while others toil to make our journeys memorable without ever coming close to affording similar luxury for themselves.

I’ve gotten some flack for believing in an American Dream, but I just can’t help it. Even though I walked through the streets of Mazatlan’s slums and saw the injustice of the de facto global caste system, I can’t stop myself from feeling that the situation can change if we just keep pushing. That sounds simplistic maybe, but that it’s the only way to keep myself from collapsing into depression and cynicism about it all.

I suppose it comes down to what might be one of the corniest, albeit spot on, sayings in sports, “You’ll miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” Look at it this way: We can't afford to sit on the sidelines contemplating whether or not to act. So I’m going to keep taking shots until I fall down dead on the field, and I hope you will too. The world is so far from perfect that it’s overwhelming to let yourself think about it for more than a minute. But the world has one thing that keeps me going and that’s the future. We can’t change the past, but we can use its lessons in our every present moment to influence the future and make sure we build the human experience into something better.

Isn’t that the American Dream? The belief that tomorrow will be better than today? And that we must have at least some control over building “our better”? To boot, I’ll leave you with a few other musings on the subject by thought-provokers extraordinaire, who most certainly can put these things more eloquently than I.

“THE WORLD IS A DANGEROUS PLACE TO LIVE; NOT BECAUSE OF THE PEOPLE WHO ARE EVIL, BUT BECAUSE OF THE PEOPLE WHO DON'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT.” (ALBERT EINSTEIN)

“DON'T BUNT. AIM OUT OF THE BALLPARK.” (DAVID OGILVY)
"GREAT SPIRITS HAVE ALWAYS FOUND VIOLENT OPPOSITION FROM MEDIOCRITIES. THE LATTER CANNOT UNDERSTAND IT WHEN A MAN DOES NOT THOUGHTLESSLY SUBMIT TO HEREDITARY PREJUDICES BUT HONESTLY AND COURAGEOUSLY USES HIS INTELLIGENCE." (ALBERT EINSTEIN)

“CYNIC: ONE WHO NOT ONLY READS BITTER LESSONS FROM THE PAST, BUT WHO IS PREMATURELY DISAPPOINTED WITH THE FUTURE.” (UNKNOWN SOURCE)

"WHAT GOOD IS A MAN WHO WON'T TAKE A STAND? WHAT GOOD IS A CYNIC WITH NO BETTER PLAN? YES, I BELIEVE THERE'S A BETTER WAY." (BEN HARPER)

Heck, I like this one so much, I'll put the video below. If you've got three minutes and 45 seconds to spare, you should watch!!!

…and although I love Mr. Harper, my personal favorite is saved for last (obviously not least!)

“NOBODY CAN GO BACK AND START A NEW BEGINNING, BUT ANYONE CAN START TODAY AND MAKE A NEW ENDING.” (MARY ROBINSON)
Bottom line: Start dreaming. And dream big. But here’s the catch—you have to actually act on those dreams in order to manifest "our better" into reality. Otherwise, we’ll end up a bunch of cynical complainers in worse trouble than we’ve ever imagined.

So here's my plan: Some of the friends I met in Mexico encouraged me to make a personal “bucket list,” which you can check out by clicking here or on the Bucket List tab on my home page. But I decided the World needed a bucket list too and I can’t make it alone. I’m taking ideas at: starnsbailey@gmail.com. Please write in and use your BIG VOICE--use it or lose it people! Then stay tuned for the reveal of the "TOP 10 THINGS HUMANITY NEEDS TO DO THIS CENTURY…IN ORDER TO MAKE IT TO THE NEXT ONE" (And what you can do to help) on Saturday, November 1.

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do: How to break up with Wall Street and Still Be Friends

2008-10-07T21:04:00.002-04:00

photo credit: missraconteur.wordpress.com/

It’s safe to say America’s love affair with Wall Street has come to a tumultuous and dramatic end. We tried to make it work, we really did. But our trust, placed with good intentions, was broken too many times in pursuit of greater prosperity. A break-up was inevitable, really, when you think about it. Wall Street has selfishly put its own needs before ours for years now, in what could be arguably deemed an abusive relationship. The veritable collision course was set as we continued to indulge in blissful ignorance over the frivolity of $300,000 homes we couldn’t afford and spending far beyond our means in spite of the wolf criers’ warnings.
I suppose we hoped, rather than believed, as they say, that a fancy new car (but it gets better gas mileage, which will save us money!) and this seasons’ latest “it purse” (but I’m pumping money into the economy!) would fix everything.

They didn’t.

And now, we’re left picking up pieces of the shit that hit the fan—all while hoping to God that the fan itself won’t come crashing down on top of us in the process. It’s messy and painful. The only thing easy about it is jumping to the conclusion that this is all Wall Street’s fault.

It’s not.

The signs of an imbalanced relationship were there and yet we continually cuddled up with our credit cards when Wall Street “worked late.” We went on lavish vacations, bought homes and cars we shouldn’t have, got manis and pedis and massages and cashmere and Jordans and iPods and a whole bunch of crap we don’t need and won’t want in a few months time.

To be fair, not all of us were ridiculously imprudent. Those of us who couldn’t afford any of the afore-mentioned, superficial ego-boosters even when times were good, are now navigating through even more dire straights. It’s not that we can’t afford to buy as much gas as we used to, it’s that we can’t afford to buy any at all. We work two jobs just to get into Section 8 housing with plumbing that’s never worked and neighbors who are either crack dealers, prostitutes or both. We eat ramen noodles and McDonald’s dollar menu delicacies and pray to God our children stay out of enough trouble to finish school. Sometimes when we feel like hoping against all hope, we dream that they will get a basketball scholarship and be able to go college—but that kind of optimism is too dangerous to indulge in on a regular basis. Or at least that’s how it feels when the cards are so decidedly stacked against you and only the most determined souls are able to make it out of poverty’s vicious cycle and get any of the trickle coming from our country's top-down economic system.

The “haves” and the “have nots” now have several things in common. One: We are all scared out of our minds because even the best jobs, with the biggest financial brokers, are no longer secure. Two: We have little to no savings to deal with losing our jobs. Three: We all got screwed by Wall Street’s reckless behavior and we all have to live with the reality that in order to save ourselves, we have to save theirs as well.

Talk about hard to stomach.

Americans, as concerned as we are about a recession that was perilously close to developing into a second Great Depression and that will still reach almost every single one of us, are more concerned with the injustice that comes in “bailing out” the bad guy. It just doesn’t still well with our sense of fairness at all. Wall street screwed us over and now we have to be the bigger person—which, P.S. still sucks regardless of knowing you are being the bigger person.

So take a deep breath America and suck it all up. This won’t be fun, easy or pretty. But that, my friends and foes, is the great thing about Americans. When it really comes down to it, and we know we’ve run out of options, we know how to gut it out. Or at least we used to—maybe we need to sit down and have a reality check with grandma and grandpa about what it took to get through the Great Depression and World War II. And maybe we’ll find a silver lining in the lesson this will teach us about how habits and living out the values we’ve been pretending to live out.

The American dream is about life, liberty and the pursuit. But it’s also about guts, determination and loyalty to the greater good. We seem to have forgotten about those three in the midst of our personal prosperity and constant success. Sometimes you’ve got to get knocked down and feel a little pain to regain your motivation to be who you truly are. This is such a moment and there’s only one thing to do-well actually there’s three. 1) Get over ourselves. 2) Grin and bear it. 3) Demand a change in the system so we don't get fooled twice.

God, You’ve got to love a break up.

I'm So Over It...Has The House Voted Yet?

2008-10-03T00:22:00.005-04:00

photo credit: Rick Wilking/AP
I'll give Sarah Palin credit--she appealed to her base and she didn't bomb. That being said, I also got exactly what I expected from her in terms of dodged questions, unsubstantiated maverick references, knocks on Joe Biden's "experience" (which is, quite ironically, a shorter experience than John McCain's) and absolutely no sign of her being qualified to be Vice-President of the United States of America.

One of the pundits on CNN made a compelling point that I haven't been able to get over. When you think of the Vice-President taking on the fate of the world in the event of a global crisis and the demise of the President, would Sarah Palin be your choice to make the ultimate choice? Is average Joe-sick-pack qualified to make that choice? No. There is a reason we entrust only very few with this task--it's a big freakin' deal and not everybody is capable of making a prudent choice for humankind. Nice as she seems, genuine as she seems, she has in no way demonstrated a sufficient understanding of the world, in the "five short weeks" she's been at this, that would warrant that responsibility being placed on her shoulders.

I've also got to give Joe Biden credit. He reigned himself in and had a clean debate. I saw absolutely ZERO instances of gender bias or sexism. It was a clean debate and I'm prodigiously proud of him for that. He respected his opponent and took Palin on as he would have any other politician. He was even able to avoid too many wordy, wonky diatribes on policy (not all, but nobody's perfect I suppose). When he did begin to wander down that sure-fire path to audience boredom, he seemed to check himself and switch back to connecting personally with the audience through his own experience as a single dad, as a parent of a soon-to-be Iraqi soldier or as a former middle-class citizen of America.

I'm re-watching the debate right now, and more and more I am impressed with the vice-presidential candidates' performances over that of their "principals." In terms of substance and in terms of addressing many of the issues that got lost in McCain and Obama's tit for tat, I'd almost go so far as to say that Biden and Palin did a better job of presenting their tickets' ideas than the actual ticket leaders. They certainly listened to the advice commentators, pundits and hopefully their own advisers gave in regards to strategy in this debate and executed it to the best of their abilities.

The one area notably left out of the debate was the financial situation we are in as a nation. That subject absolutely must be addressed in the next presidential debate in great detail. In lieu of Iraq, policy and reform in this area is going to be the trademark of the next presidency. Things have changed. For the first time in a long time, Americans are listing the state of our economy as their number one concern. This is no longer an election about getting out of Iraq--it's about the bill we are stuck with, partially as a result of Iraq, and how the hell we are going to pay it off . It's a no-brainer that the next president will go down in history for how he handles this situation.

I can't believe I'm still saying it, but the race just gets more interesting everyday. I could go on for another hour about the dynamics of the debate and comments made by the candidates, but I haven't much time for that. The House is musing over this so-called bailout bill and how they'll handle the ball the Senate threw back into their court with overwhelming support. Frankly their vote tomorrow trumps anything that went down tonight.

I'll wrap it up, so you and I can get to bed and get a few hours of sleep before the chaos that may ensue once we wake. Bottom line: The fight goes to Biden, but Palin held her own. No knockouts and the never-ending race goes on. 33 days until we pull the lever and punch our chad in what will certainly be the most important presidential election of my life--maybe yours too. McCain, Obama or Mickey Mouse--the point is this: get out there and get involved. Our country is not living up to its potential and the only way we can turn it around is engage with all the intensity we can muster. This little girl knows a thing or two about using her voice and I urge you with every ounce of volume I've got to use yours and tell our leaders what you need with resounding resolve. This land is your land, this land is my land--it's time to take better ownership of it.

Top Gun v. Will Hunting...And The Winner Is?

2008-09-27T15:50:00.008-04:00

What do you need to know about last night's Presidential Debate? It pretty much comes down to this: fighter pilot v. academia. Yep, that just about sums it up. Two very different men, who both love their country, showcasing very different approaches to our common issues.

Even if you know everything there is to know about the big ticket issues (the economy, the environment, Iran, health care, the Iraq War, taxes, etc.) and where the candidates stand on them, debates are a great forum to see how candidates handle themselves in front of a non-partisan audience and under the adversity that comes from being directly challenged by your opponent. Debates can also give great insight into the character of candidates due to the fact that they are less scripted than a stump speech.

Are they confident or cocky? Are they tough or do they crumble under pressure? Can they take a hit and then dish it back? Can they get specific about HOW they will accomplish goals or are they still stuck expounding on what the goal is? Do they know their shit or are they full of shit?

And most importantly, can they pronounce foreign nouns correctly? Because, for God's sake, I've had enough of (as @rawallison put it so perfectly last night on Twitter) "Eye-Rak" and "Eye-Ran" to last me a good long while.

I got some answers to the above questions in last night's debate and came a little closer to sealing the deal on my candidate of choice. I never make a final decision until I'm there at the voting booth, because what goes down right before an election can be really eye-opening. Sometimes you think you've settled it based solely on the issues and then three days before the election somebody will do something ridiculous that causes you to rethink your whole decision based on a revolting and previously unrevealed personality trait. Like it or not, most of America doesn't vote on the issues. They vote based on who they like and who they relate to. And let's be honest, even those of us who do look deep back into voting records and take time to really consider the consequences and benefits of proposed plans, make our decisions partially based on personality.

So, of course I had to watch last night and watch these two personalities paired head-to-head. Here's what I learned in my hour and half in front of the T.V.

John McCain's strategy is to gain voter trust by making Barack Obama out to be naive and ignorant to world issues, while at the same time playing up his own 30 years experience in Washington (Note: you are correct in wondering why he should be cleared from any sort of blame for being PART of the government that has gotten us into the mess we currently find ourselves surrounded by. Answer: Because he said so...and because he's evidently one of those rare holy grails of politics--The self-professed Maverick. Comforting knowledge indeed). The twist in the story is that McCain is also proclaiming himself as a change candidate--one that can stand up to Washington and mend their evil and corrupt ways.

McCain's tactics, during the debate, included mentioning his relationships with and adoration of Ronald Reagan and Henry Kissinger every two minutes and repeating the assertion that Obama just "doesn't understand" because he wasn't there back in the day. It also included a list of his summer vacation destinations and the people he "knows" and "knows how to work with" because, as previously mentioned, "[He's] been there." Just in case you were curious, people & places that made it on his list were: Ronald Reagan, Henry Kissinger, Afghanistan, Iraq, Vietnam, Israel, Vladamir Putin, Pakistan, The 1980s in Washington, The 1990s in Washington and the 2000s in Washington. Also making appearances: Elton John, Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohan, every ma and pa coffee shop owner in small-town America, Michael Vick, the moon, the Dalai Lama, the world's largest ball of string, Oprah, the south pole, the north pole, me, my momma and of course, last, but not least... yo momma.

Yeah, well George W. Bush went to New Orleans and hung out with the people from the 9th ward after Hurricane Katrina. We've all seen how much good THAT did. Sorry, but having access to Air Force One and a valid passport stamped full doesn't automatically qualify one as a good leader capable of achieving diplomatic success. Good try though.

Now, playing the whole name dropping and "I've been there, done that" games got real old, real fast, but that's more annoying than problematic to me. I get why McCain is doing it--it proves he has the relationships and experience to get things done on the world stage. Cool. What's disappointing for me is to see a man, whom I've previously found to be very classy, begin to use the tactic of attacking Obama as a person. Very not classy.

Last night I found John McCain to be very condescending and disrespectful towards Barack Obama concerning his understanding of the world and evidently of the words "tactic" and "strategy." What is this, the SATs? Pretty sure he gets it. I mean, it's not like Barack Obama is clueless. He's not George W. Bush and he's not 18 either. He's freakin' 47 and has degrees from Columbia and Harvard (that weren't earned with Daddy's money on "Gentleman's Cs"). I'd rather have heard more from McCain about why Obama's policy ideas won't be successful. I'd rather have heard him speak in more detail about his plans rather than continually question Obama's intellectual capacity on vocabulary and history.

Obama's "Change" platform is geared to inspire voters to get re-engaged based on the idea that together we can affect positive change. But lately, Obama has also had to tie John McCain to President Bush's to convince us that McCain's claim that he too represents a change isn't true. Obama got in some good punches about McCain's record on President Bush's biggest proposals and how McCain supposedly agrees with the President 90% of the time. But he spent more time attempting to play defense from McCain's jabs about his naivety than convincing me of the inevitability of four years of George W. Bush Part II: The McCain years. I say attempting because McCain basically shut him out from any defensive tactic several times by continuing to defiantly rattle on over Obama's response--which I saw as tacky and a little desperate.

In spite of often being on defense, Obama did a reasonably good job in avoiding the appearance of being emotionally defensive, but you can't win any game without passionate defense (there is such a fine line between the two, but the best politicians find a way to walk it). When he found room to make a defensive move, Obama was prepared to contradict McCain's assertions with information. I just didn't see much passion when McCain was laying into him; more frustration at being talked over than taking deep offense to the assertions. That's got to change and here's why: Effective and passionate defense always opens up opportunity for aggressive offense. Obama can't let McCain talk over him like he did last night if he wants to win either of the next debates, or the election in November. He must find a way to walk the line between passion and pathetic. So much of politics is making power plays and the candidate with the appearance of power and strength often comes out on top. Even though McCain's aggression may be viewed negatively by undecided voters, Obama's response to it is equally as important. I expected Obama to do something more about the bully-like abuse coming from McCain, but was left feeling disappointed in the lack of action from him. Passivity is NOT how you affect change dude.

I don't think I'm alone in saying that I walked away wanting more from both of the candidates. There are still so many unanswered questions and still 38 days until the election. That's a hell of a lot of time and plenty enough for somebody to utter a Howard Dean Scream and throw the whole thing away.

Note: Photographs used for this story are by David Mills for the New York Times.

SYSTEM...ENGAGE!!!

2008-09-22T22:33:00.003-04:00

Back in action and better than ever baby! Stellar weekend. Absolutely fabulous. Common concert, Oregon Ducks football and tailgating (w/lots of raw fruits & veggies thanks to fabulous Aunt Brenda!!!), and dinner with new friends is just about the most perfect way to spend three days that I can come up with.

Never mind that I didn't get my laundry done and had to wear not-so-clean clothes to work today.

Never mind that the U.S. financial market big boys were being bailed out by the biggest governmental rescue plan ever to be formulated since the Great Depression.

Never mind that you and I will be paying off the national debt this move is creating until we are long cold in our graves.

Never mind that Sarah Palin is the biggest farce of an environmental warrior that I've seen in a LONG time.

Never mind that I still relish the fact that John McCain chose a woman (any woman) as his running mate, because in terms of progress for the Republican Party, this is HUGE.

Never mind that my trunks from Burning Man are still half-packed even though I'm already planning for next year.

None of it matters, because every single second of my weekend felt goooooooooodddddddd. And when you've got it going on, you've got to take advantage of it.

Post Traumatic Burn Syndrome

2008-09-14T14:13:00.007-04:00

Lately I've been feeling really withdrawn from any form of technology or media or connecting with the world. It took me a week after Burning Man to even write a post about it and another week sitting on the post to put it up on the site. I'd get on the web, pull up a page and heave a giant sigh. I'm not ready for this.

I keep flashing back to the playa. Post-Traumatic Burn Syndrome. Except in this case, it's the real world that has a traumatic effect on one's psyche. It's like patron saint of Black Rock City is a siren calling out to me, sometimes faintly, sometimes screaming. She sure as hell draws you in.

But come on. I mean, really. What the hell? The girl who always has something to say doesn't feel like weighing in on the world? This is some serious business. I was having a bit of a personality meltdown. Especially since the news is fraught with dramatic headliner events--Wall Street stalwarts collapsing, devastating hurricanes, gender politics on the national scene. I should be foaming at the mouth to comment on all of it and yet I was feeling quite passe. So over it.

In the end I had to hit the reset button and reboot. My little pinwheel was stuck in an endless whirl of "I don't care" (At least though, I cared that I didn't care--if it had gone a step further and hit the "I don't care that I don't care" phase, I might have checked myself into an institution). My internal processor was just that overloaded from the Burning Man experience. Let me tell you that I am now an even bigger supporter of activity rather than apathy. God it felt horrible. Lack of motivation to be engaged is seriously the most surreal and horrid experience for me to go through. I might be crazy, but I'd rather be a little cuckoo every single freakin' day of my life than spend one of them feeling apathetic.

Right after I got back from Black Rock City, I had a very telling dream. It was if my mind knew I was about to go through this process and tried to clue me in (Of course it went WHOOSH, right over my pretty little head). I dreamed I was stuck in the inner compartment of a pumpkin shaped art-car (@ Burning Man people bring these tricked out artistic cars to ride around in and give other burners rides back and forth across the playa). It was almost pitch black, but I could very faintly see, through playa encrusted windows, that there was some light coming through from the outside. I wasn't going to die or suffocate--I knew this much. But I had this incredibly strong urge that I simply HAD to get out of the car. Things were going on without me and that was absolutely disturbing. I was screaming for help, knowing full well that my little cage was in a secluded area of the playa with no sign of anyone around (digression: isn't it crazy how you innately "know" things about situations in your dreams without anything to back them up from the course of events unfolding?). I began to grope all around for a way out. I felt very certain, through my simmering panic, that there was indeed a way out and that I had to work very quickly to find it. After a few minutes of frantic searching, I found a window that slid open to reveal a screen. Elated, I reached forward to punch the screen out, only to snap out of the dream as my fingertips felt the perforated texture of it.

I was in my room. Thrust back into consciousness with the simple firing of a synapse between my finger and my mind, disoriented and instantly trying to come to grips with just what the hell happened.

I started cracking up, because the answer to getting out of the art car was so simple and because the panic I felt in my dream was so silly and useless. I just had to get back to living. Back to the now and away from the playa. I'll be back soon enough, but I can't spend a year trying to stay there in my mind. We only get to live on her for a week per annum and that is part of what makes our time there so magical. The rest of the year, her spirit lives through us and our actions as we continue walking our paths. Far be it for me to mess with that. I might be little. I might be loud. But I know when to go with the flow and ask questions later. That time is now. And I'm so here.

You Down With BRC? Yeah You Know ME!!!

2008-09-07T14:20:00.007-04:00

Fact: My "shake your booty to any sound with a bumping beat reflex" often gets in the way of my ability to take care of myself.

Point in case: Burning Man decompression party last night.

Being a bit sick and weezy never stopped this little girl--oh no. I have no patience for being under the weather. I just surge ahead and tell my illness to get the hell out. I am stronger than you!!! I can and will continue to rage it even if I'm hacking up a lung on the side.

However, my propensity to party on doesn't extend to things like blogging. What a lazy ass blogger I have been the past three weeks! Alas! No more! I will post! I will share photos! I will tell crazy stories of being trapped in an art car (only to later wake up at my bedroom window trying to punch the screen out and realizing that was all a dream and that I'd been sleep walking).

Let's get started!

Seeing as Burning Man is not JUST a week long chance for adults to play (I mean, that's what it is, but at the same time it's more) and that there ARE life lessons to learn if you so choose to engage yourself, I thought I'd share a few morsels of knowledge I picked up out on the playa.

Burning Man lesson No.1: Awesomeness is achieved by taking it one step further than the last guy or gal. The crazier the better. The nakeder the better. As the Nike Commercial says: My better is better than your better!!! JUST DO IT!!!

Burning Man lesson No.2: Cleanliness is a luxury not reserved for time in Black Rock City. Showers are pointless. You will be playafied within 10 minutes of stepping out of one (playa being the alkaline dust deserts that make up the landscape at Burning Man). It will take several weeks for your hair and skin to recover once home.

Burning Man lesson No.3: You won't give a damn (that you aren't clean, that is). Everybody else is in the same boat. The environment is part of the challenge!

Burning Man lesson No.4: Magical things go down in BRC. It's a vortex of positive, collected energy, engineered and manifested to create experiences that you won't ever forget. e.g. I was getting a bloody mary one morning and noticed this man's pendant. It was a beautiful enameled circle with a colorful burning man in the middle. I was struck! I thought, "I MUST have one!!!" So, I politely asked what camp he had visited to pick that baby up. Turns out it was from last year and he didn't think the same group was in BRC in 08'. Bummer dude. We got our cocktails and headed back to camp. On the way, I noticed a camp with a lounge that had a state of Oregon flag, prompting me to shout out, "HELL YEAH OREGON!!!" My enthusiasm got us an invitation for snow cones, which we gladly accepted. I started chatting with a woman from Coos Bay and really connected with her. Before I left she told me to sit tight, because she had something for me. To my complete surprise and amazement she came back with the 2008' version of the pendant I had so lovingly admired. This was not 10 minutes after being told I was pretty much out of luck. You can't tell me that's a coincidence. I would call you an fool to ignore the beauty in this simple example of the enormous positive power the universe holds. It wasn't earth shattering or mind blowing. Just a quiet, gentle voice reminding me that I have a guide and to trust my instincts, manifest wherever and whenever I can, and to always always always hold on to hope.

Burning Man lesson No.5: Random solitary mashing can be way more fun than staying with your group. I kind of tend to get lost. I mean, I know where I am, but I usually lose track of where everybody else is. Which doesn't tend to be a problem. I always meet the most awesome people this way. The boys at Moonshine Tavern and the Absinthe gurus at the Golden Calf, the Carl Cox look-a-like who played men's volleyball at Brown, Potty Mouth (who graduated from my cross town rival high school), the Ella Fitzgerald sound-a-like out of the audience at the Jazz Club, the list goes on and on. So down with random solitary mashing. Best part being it never stays solitary for long!

Burning Man lesson No. 6: Dancing is good for the soul AND the bootie! Let me tell you! I danced my ass off last week and it felt gooooooodddddddd. I am such a happier person when I get a good dance session in daily. I think I need to date a DJ. Yeah that'd be good. But in all seriousness, dancing is such a freeing experience and a connecting one at the same time. I can't think of many other times when I've felt better than when in the middle of an intensely ridiculous session. Talk about being in the now with your entire mind, body and soul. Damn. Getting inspired here. Think I'm gonna go put on some jams now.

Well actually, I'm gonna go crash, since my new job has be in to work around 5:00 a.m. Gotta get those Benjamins baby. Saving up for Burning Man NEXT year. Holllllaaaaaaaaa!

Newest Waggoner Family Member

2008-08-12T00:12:00.006-04:00

Well he's technically a Beldman, but that's of little consequence. This is Jonathan Tae-Hun and my Aunt and Uncle just met him for the first time in Seoul, South Korea today. They've been through a lot trying to have a child and we are all SO excited for their joy!!!

We got the email about 10 minutes ago. This situation is when I just LOVE technology! I was watching Philip McCluskey's video on Juice Feasting on lovingraw.com and my Blackberry buzzed in with an email. When I saw the header, this little girl went a running down the hall and into the living room with the news! Grandma was called as well as the rest of the family. It's not like we couldn't have waited until we checked email tomorrow, but we're awfully glad to know about all of this tonight!

Will Work For Raw, Organic, Vegan Food: Lessons in Foraging

2008-08-07T14:15:00.008-04:00

This week I've been foraging for wild food around town and also for work. Let me just put it out there: I hate (HATE) job searching! Thank God this one didn't last long. After pressing the career reset button, I was a little anxious about finding something quickly so I wouldn't have to depend on Mom and Dad to pay bills for long. I got lucky and was hired today by Lifetouch Studios. I had pretty much every school portrait of my young life taken by Lifetouch and now I'll be the one behind the camera.

I'm feeling extremely grateful to the universe for being able to find work within the field I'm pursuing. School photography won't exactly earn me a Pulitzer, but it does teach you a lot about lighting very ill-lit rooms and I'll be working with complex cameras that will be fun to learn on. The chance to work with cameras on a day to day basis makes me want to squeal with joy (*Sqeeeeeeeeeeeeee* That was for you Blaqberry!)!!!!!!

What else makes my joy runneth over? Freegan finds!!! Within the last week I have been lucky enough to find both apples and blackberries! These didn't come from a grocery's dumpster (I'm still wary of this technique--so many germs in a dumpster!). They came from an even better source: Unsprayed urban trees and bushes! The City of Eugene does not spray any of its properties with pesticides, leaving plants that yield produce mostly organic in nature. In addition, many, like the trees we got windfall apples from, are located in parks that were once part of farm homesteads and did not grow from Genetically Modified seeds.

You would be surprised what you can find around your city if you begin looking. Beyond a backyard, porch or windowsill garden, using free urban resources to supplement your groceries is such a freakin' great practice to adopt during the warm months. Instead of paying $5.00 for a pint of organic berries, we've found a spot and I get as much as I want for FREE! That's zero, zip, nada, zilch! Wild greens are another easily found money saver. Think about how much you would spend on dandelion greens at Whole Foods. Seriously! It's worth a little research and/or covert planting on your behalf! I haven't found a source for wild greens in Eugene yet, (mostly because I've been working on the mammoth load of organic ones in our garden out back) but I've only been here a week, so just give me time!

Before I wrap this up, I've got to talk about those blackberries Mom found in the park at the end of our street. These babies were sweet and succulent--just the way a blackberry should be. Can't wait to go get a giant bowl full and stuff my face with them! Raw Blackberry Cobbler anybody? No doubt it will be in the dehydrator before the day is up!

But first we've got to let the fruit leather we are making from the pulp of the apples we juiced in the AM finish and I've got a craving for corn jalapeno chips too! I might just have to invest in another dehydrator. The one we have is constantly full of goodies! I love it!

Speaking of...off to make those chips (Using Sarma Melngailis's recipe out of Raw Food, Real World that I discovered via Penni from Real Food Tulsa's recipe! Thanks Miss Vroom!) .

Ciao bellas and beaus!

Each Day Gets Better, I Just Can't Let It Go

2008-08-04T15:39:00.004-04:00

If you aren't a native or transplanted Northwesterner, then let me enlighten you as to how a perfect summer day goes here. It always involves getting outdoors--ALWAYS. We are blessed with a constant drizzle of rain about nine months out of the year, so as soon as the sun peeks out, we take full advantage of her with no apologies! Yesterday was no exception.

My friend Elizabeth picked me up round lunchtime and we headed out with her dad's raft (The Fish Hunter 360--which is evidently a pretty bad ass boat, seeing as some dudes with the Fish Hunter 280 were really quite envious of her as they watched us put into the river), a six pack of Oregon brewed IPA, Liz's orange waterproof camera and hearts ready for adventure!

Our group of eight just happened to include many of my favorite Oregonians and a few newer faces that turned into great friends by the end of the trip. It was absolutely the most glorious day to be out on the water: 80 degrees, not a cloud in the sky. We floated, we played, we surfed the rapids and foraged for wild blackberry's on the banks (you can bet those haven't been sprayed with evil chemical pesticides!).

I brought raw snacks for all to enjoy and was super pumped that my GLT (Guacamole, Lettuce and Tomato) sandwiches with flax seed bread were such a hit! Nobody went hungry munching on those, organic cherries and cantalope--YUM!!!

Upon arrival back home I also found that behind my back, my two best friends and my parents had organized a little get together to welcome me home! I was so totally clueless as to what was going on. I didn't even get it when we "randomly" came upon my parents and Elizabeth's boyfriend in a neighborhood park. I mean, really? I have a college degree right?

I said it several times that yesterday just couldn't have manifested itself any better and I stand by my word on that. Water, sunshine and good friends is all we need here to have a fantastic time and we had all three in spades. I hope you all had a day just like mine: refreshing and inspiring!

Cheers!

No, I Don't Have A Plan. Thanks For Asking!

2008-07-31T19:13:00.002-04:00

The deed has officially been done. Reset button hit on life. Quarter-life crisis successfully averted. Or maybe aided and abetted--I'm not sure which. All I know is that as my plane flew by the peaks of Mt. Hood on the descent into Portland, countless adventures were looming on the horizon, threatening to make Chapter 3 of this Little Girl's life experience one hell of a good time.

Taking Over, One Asana At A Time

2008-07-06T23:39:00.005-04:00

I'm obsessed with the idea, I'll fully admit this! Ever since Bliss of Being alerted me to this ridiculous form of partner yoga, I've been showing this video to every friend and foe that's come through our home. All nine minutes and 39 seconds of it.

It's so freakin' cool that I can hardly stand it. So cool that I am pretty much bound and determined that I will be an acro-yoga efficienado within a year's time. Well. Maybe two.

This positive attitude looks past the fact that my yoga skills are intermediate and my flexibility could stand some MAJOR improvement. It forgets that I can't currently afford to attend the number of classes it would take to get to this level, and the reality that it requires a time commitment I would struggle to make.

But then I watch another video and that all goes out the window.

Sometimes it just feels good to say, "screw it", doesn't it? I get some sort of sick joy out of defying expectations (admittedly sometimes of my own making) and rising to a level above most people A) do not believe me capable of reaching and/or B) are too afraid to aspire to themselves. I don't know whether this is just a rebellious attitude with selfish motivation or that of an independent soul with a propensity to break the rules in order to reach greater heights. I hope the latter. I don't break rules to disappoint people I love, only to increase my own joy and understanding in and of the world. I guess the lesson to learn is that you have to disappoint others sometimes in order to avoid disappointing yourself. But you also have to trust that your strength, balance and flexibility as a human being will be all you need to get through it--that and maybe the corresponding capabilities of a trusted partner who is standing by to support your every move.

Acro-Yoga here I come!

Give Them An Inch And They'll take a Centimeter

2008-07-02T18:17:00.004-04:00

photo credit: David Sanders/New York Times
My friend Rawbin on Twitter--wonderful, crazy lady--sent out the link to this video the other day. I had heard of this Buddhist couple earlier, but hadn't really taken the time to think much about their lifestyle, which involves spending their days as close to each other's consciousness as possible. In a physical sense, this involves their being within 15 feet of one another at all times. In a spiritual sense, they try to experience everything together, not just with each other, but as each other.

So this video, is about a New York couple that decides to try it for a day and finds that our modern and very individualistic habits don't mesh so well with the concept. We like to be in the driver's seat. We don't like to wait for others to catch up. We don't like to stop what we're doing so that our companions can accomplish a separate task.

I've talked before about the Me l I l Mine focus of our culture before and this is a classic example of how it's manifested itself, even in our most intimate relationships. When forced to live by another's schedule, it doesn't take long for one to become very frustrated--especially if you are lacking patience as a virtue, as I usually am! What I really like about the theory behind this practice is that it forces the participants to deal with issues right then and there, because there is no "time-out" or cool-off period. Anger or jealousy don't get bottled up inside. There's no chance for either to poison the body, mind or spirit. It's just a much more efficient way to work within a relationship. Even if you would never even entertain dreaming of trying this arrangement temporarily, much less permanently, that lesson alone is worth learning from these stories.

Too easy to be true?

2008-06-23T13:26:00.010-04:00

photo credit: www.inhabitat.com

I absolutely LOVE creative people…those expressive souls who are constantly making you say, “Gosh, I wish I’d thought of that!”

Point in case: San Francisco’s reverse graffiti artists.

They took an art form, considered by a large majority of the public to be offensive, ugly and negative, and flipped it upside into a positive expression of cleanliness and progress.

Too freakin’ cool.

In other news, I have my first tomato on my porch plants!!! I was beginning to wonder if they would ever start popping up, but when I went out to check on them after the monsoon on Saturday, lo and behold, a single green marble of veggie goodness had appeared! Of course I dashed into the house for my camera to document the event (lest any of you be skeptical of my gardening prowess). See photo for proof that I do NOT have the black thumb of death!!! I can’t tell you how exciting it will be to eat that first tomato that I grew, or rather didn’t kill—I don’t exactly have the best track record with keeping plants alive.I have a much better track record with rocking a party until it shuts down and I lived up to my reputation this weekend. Friday night, I drove out to Miss Sophia’s place for Charlotte’s raw food uncookbook club and five course meal.

Photo Credit: www.vikterduplaix.com
After a delicious sampling of raw delights—carrot ginger soup, pina coladas, tacos, almond cherry tart and a lovely salad with pears and spiced pumpkin seeds—Sophie and I were off to dance the night away to the musical genius of Vikter Duplaix. This dude is a serious mastermind of sound and rhythm. He sings, song writes, produces and spins. A renaissance man—my kind of guy!

So Sophie and I burned off A LOT of calories at Loft 1523, ripping it up with the rest of the crowd, but we couldn’t resist hitting the after party at Hom from 2-4am. That raw food goodness will keep you going long into the night baby! So we popped in to catch Mark Farina’s last set upstairs and then rushed downstairs when we heard Vikter was taking over the tables below. Two more glorious hours of his hot eclectic groove and our feet were killing, but our souls were uplifted. You know what they say, “No pain, No Gain!”

You’ve got to check out Monsieur Duplaix if you get the chance. I’m a bit obsessed with his sound at the moment. Went home and downloaded everything I could find and have been playing it non-stop (well, I had to take a six-hour break for my favorite flick, A&E’s Pride & Prejudice, but you get the picture) around the house all weekend. I guess when something gets into your system, you’ve just got to let it take its course and give into the groove.

The weekend closed out with another Monsoon that closed down Charlotte Symphony’s Pops in the Park event. We got about two hours of music in at the South Park Outdoor Amphitheater before the impending clouds settled over us and began to dump their contents onto the crowd. We made it to the car just in time to avoid getting completely drenched and shuttled home for some well earned shut eye and the start of a new week.

There are times when you look around and experience moments of profound happiness and this weekend was rife with them. I simply enjoyed everything life gave to me over the past three days and I’ve got to say that the feeling of joy is such an energizer! I woke this morning feeling refreshed and renewed despite the fact that my sleep count was severely lacking, my allergies were acting up and the clouds had taken over my clear blue Southern skies. So get out there people! Do what you love! Do what gets into your system and let it take hold of you—mind, body and soul! That’s the secret to finding happiness right there. It’s almost too easy to be true.

Another Giant Leap For Mankind...

2008-06-16T14:09:00.005-04:00

One of the big things that separates human beings from other forms of life (other than obvious physical features such as opposing thumbs and gigantor brains) is our capacity to hope, dream and aspire to greatness. This ability is SUCH a gift. It is really awesome when you think about it. Whatever we can imagine, we can aspire to. And we do. We get it done, for better or for worse.

Today, I'd rather not dwell on getting it done to the detriment of society. We see enough of that in the news. You can check out any of the front pages if you need a heady dose of reality on this lovely Monday. Personally, I need some Life, Liberty and Pursuit in my world. So today my focus is on a community that is getting it done for the better. When their city was completely leveled in the physical/tangible sense by an EF5 (i.e. RIDICULOUS) tornado on May 4, 2007, the citizens of Greensburg, Kansas were crushed. But not for long. Soon, they realized a monumental opportunity lay before them--they could rebuild their city and they could do it using the greenest technology available; they would show the world that the heartland of rural America is ready for sustainable living in every sense of that concept.

Even Leonardo DiCaprio, a Hollywood Champion of sustainable culture, realized how incredibly meaningful this project and this community can be to pushing mainstream America Green. He's producing a documentary series on the transformation on the Discovery Channel/Planet Green, because the word HAS to get out about this. I totally feel his excitement! I mean, think about it!!! The ENTIRE city is going to be LEED PLATNIUM CERTIFIED. Yes that's right, I said PLAT-TI-NIUM. God I love me some Greeny Bling Bling.

I feel at a loss for the right words to explain just how huge I think this is. I have butterflies fluttering around my stomach writing this!!! Such a courageous and pioneering effort; one that will hopefully go down in history as a step akin to the giant leap for mankind we took when landing on the moon. That might seem a bit overblown to some, but just wrap your mind around the fact that this is mainstream, normal, conservative, rural America seeing and acting on the big picture in a way most of us can't even fathom.

And if they get it, so can everybody else. That's why the step is so huge. Walking on the moon was a magnificent feat and proved what humanity CAN do when we sink our effort into something. This step shows what humanity WILL do with all of our power and knowledge.

America was built around the premise of choice. And boy do are we facing a doozey of a decision! Will we save the planet we marvel at from space? Or will we squander it?

Greensburg's vote is in. How will you cast yours?

Pot Calling Kettle Black--But In a Most Humorous way!!!

2008-06-10T20:41:00.004-04:00

Disclaimer: Watch with an open mind. This is a piece of modern satire and invokes a needed discussion on the hypocrisy (not to mention impracticality) that is the current American political climate. My personal statement is that I think it unfairly sticks it to one party in particular. I believe that the entire political environment on BOTH sides of the isle could use some shaping up, seeing as many of the issues brought up in this little video span back into the last presidency (and beyond) as well. However--It's still hilarious and ridiculousy witty! Enjoy!

Follow Your Own Path--Even If You Cannot Do It Perfectly

2008-06-08T20:23:00.006-04:00

photo credit: Lyn Sims
OK, I know I'm posting out the whazoo this weekend, but I came across this while researching bikram yoga (Yoga done in a very hot environment--our room today was 95 degrees Fahrenheit). It really struck me.

"The roots of Vedanta philosophy ask us to believe in ourselves and believe in God. Karma yoga, the yoga of action, is knowing your gift and using it. No one can force you to do what's not for you. In the Bhagvad Gita, Krishna tells Arjuna,
'It is better to follow your own calling imperfectly than follow another's perfectly. If death should come while following your own path, this is surely better than living with the fear and anguish of following a false path.' (3:35) When we're forced to do something that is against our own nature, our soul is unhappy, there is no peace. When the soul is unhappy, pain begins to trouble the body as well. Rather than change your ways to conform with the world, you must eventually find a way to express your truth from your heart regardless of the world.

What makes your soul happy? What is your goal? Since the rest of the world doesn't care what your soul wants, it is up to you to find out."

(from http://www.bikramyoga.com/)

This is the most relevant thing I've heard with regards to what I am going through at this very moment.

I feel so very blessed to have found this passage--and a new way of looking at the situation.

I Guess We Need a Personal Photographer, Cause We Suck At Taking Photos

2008-06-08T13:17:00.004-04:00

My friends and I are retarded. We took exactly ZERO pictures on my birthday last night. I wonder about us sometimes, LOL.

Though to be fair, Jennie brought her camera, but the lens wouldn't open. Bummer. But my phone actually has a very nice camera WITH a flash and we still didn't take any pics?! Not to sound ridiculously shallow, but we looked hot last night and I want proof to show my daughters in 20 years. Yours truly rocked a white strapless number that definitely made me strut my stuff all night.

The night started off with uncorking a bottle of bubbly (the cork hit like every wall in our condo LOL!) at our place and then on to dinner at this restaurant called Feast. They could have just named it Delicious. I had an arugula salad with walnuts, beets and green olives. YUMMY!!! I was a bad raw foodie and also had goat cheese on my salad and a bite of Beth's chocolate and banana crepe. Both were AMAZING and soooooooooo worth it.

Then we walked through the mess and maze of Taste of Charlotte over to SUITE (still strutting...John Travolta would have been so proud of me). SUITE, like Feast, is super swanky--which I love. I just loved getting dressed up and going out on the town for martinis, etc. It's kind of the last thing I haven't given up with the whole raw food lifestyle. My last frontier I guess you could say. I just love me a good dirty gin martini!!! I think I like feeling very Carrie Bradshaw in NYC for a few hours, LOL! Someday New York, you and I will be together at last. I feel you calling to me. I'm working on it oh sweet Siren!

But I digress. Back to last night. No pictures at SUITE either. Retarded. Well that's not entirely true. I did take one shot of my friend Dianne with some sparkly table decoration. Random.

So we finished the night dancing ourselves into oblivion (DJ even played MIA which made Jennie happy happy happy), shut down the club and headed to Pita Pit (which we immediately nixed as the line was out the door and spilling onto the street. Waiting 40 minutes for a pita in heels? No thank you. Not worth it).

Woke up this morning and Beth and Jennie gave me my birthday present: A freakin' bad ass Rocket smoothie maker. It's like one of those magic bullet things and I'm so pumped to use it for green smoothies and juices. Traveling especially will be SO much easier. I mean who has room for a giant blender in their suitcase? Not me. That's like four pair of shoes I could have brought. This baby will only take the place of one pair of shoes and I can live with that.

I already tested the nut milk making capacity and it's good. It has a little strainer application that does a pretty good job getting the grit. It's not as good as a nut milk bag or cheese cloth, but who wants to bother with all that in a hotel room? Not me. I'll be testing it for soups and more creamy things later. I want to see if it can actually get things made with soaked nuts smooth.

Which got me to thinking. Why the hell is there no mini-Vitamix? Or Vita-bullet, if you will? I know they make industrial level machines, but the raw foodists of the world would surely appreciate a bullet-esque vitamix for travel. Not to mention people who like to make a single serving smoothie or juice in the morning and take it with them to work or whatever (i.e. me).

Like my friend Tiffany always says--I should write a letter.

So I'll be trying out my new toy all day and predict that I will be very happy about it. Also trying out Maca for the first time. I took some yesterday with almond butter and was totally blissed out for the evening. Put it in my matte this morning and tasted OK there too. I will be trying in smoothies and upping the dose to see what's best for me. Right now I'm at a little under a 1/4 teaspoon. I can feel the effects, but no adverse reaction, so I'll just keep bracketing until I find the perfect dose.

Did That Really Just Happen?

2008-06-07T10:50:00.002-04:00

I meant to post this yesterday, but I got sidetracked.

It definitely makes my list of The Top 10 Things I Never Expected to See.

Tree Hugging Former Presidential Candidates: I was watching CNN yesterday and was this close to turning the TV off to head to work, but God I'm so glad I didn't. I saw the most amazing thing: Jesse Jackson and Pat Buchanan doing a commercial for a cause. TOGETHER. And, get this, they were doing a commercial on saving the environment!

I was like....WHAT?!?!?!?!?

I seriously pondered whether my green smoothie was laced with something.

But no, it was real. I suppose miracles never cease to amaze and I'll be honest--I freakin' like this miracle a whole lot. Here's why. This teeny tiny commercial is really a giant step for mankind. It tells me that people are waking up to the reality of environmental consequences and that the cause is transcending political lines. I mean, come on--when Pat Buchanan (Mr. "Right From The Beginning") and the Rev. Jesse Jackson (Mr."Left Conservatism Behind When He Sprang From The Womb") actually AGREE on something AND think it's a big enough deal to willingly be in each other's company, the issue is HUGE. Now I know that, and you probably do to, but there are still so many global citizens who are clueless as to how big the issues of climate change and environmental preservation are (i.e. our current Prez).

And a commercial, admittedly, is not going to solve all of our problems, but there is a major lack of awareness that still exists in this country and beyond that challenge, there is also a lack of urgency. I think initiatives like this will act like alarm clocks for people and let them know that its OK to be a Bible toting environmentalist. That you don't have to be on the far out fringes of the left to love your planet and want to keep it in good health. When the issues moves from the extremes and into the mainstream it is a much better thing for us all. I hope more people with influence will continue to push the message and get it out there for the people that still need to hear that being green isn't just trendy--it's absolutely necessary if we are going to make it as a species for another millennium.

I really really wanted to include the vid for you, but couldn't find it on the web and I'm too impatient to keep looking after 20 minutes. Sorry, my name is little girl I BIG VOICE, not little girl I BIG PATIENCE.

However, for good measure, I have included an extremely relevant ad from the environmental defense fund that I found while looking for the other. Enjoy!

The Stickiest Hug Giver You Ever Saw

2008-05-30T13:13:00.004-04:00

This is my Grandpa Earl in a nutshell. I love this comic for making me smile and think of his fantastic hugs.

Crazy Scary Good

2008-05-27T22:52:00.003-04:00

Wow, sorry for the absence people. I was connected in Texas, but only through Blackberry. I had a great time with Mary and Gabe at their wedding (more to come on that later), ate and drank way too much and am back in Charlotte. It's REALLY hit me that I am leaving very soon. I've started to get busy putting together my portfolio, selling almost everything I have accumulated in college (and it's A LOT) and making plans. The challenge in all of this is to remember to stay present and make sure I really enjoy my time here and my people here while I have them readily available.

I feel so fortunate that I've got a lot of you wonderful people out there floating around in the world, making your presence known and keeping me sane. My love is definitely a bit promiscuous when it comes to geography, but I have no intention of holding it back. Charlotte is just one more city that I will have loved and lost to some extent. I am always missing people and places, but the silver lining is that a plane ticket and an email can solve all of that.

So while everything here is making it pretty challenging to detach, I feel a wee bit better knowing that I can come back to these people and they'll be the same even if the skyline changes.

It's been a pretty good day. I'm broke and jobless after June. I've turned down four opportunities to play it safe and I'm scared as hell about job searching as a photojournalist. But it feels freakin' great to make a choice.

It's crazy scary good.

Ashes to Ashes or Cradle to Cradle?

2008-05-15T22:43:00.003-04:00

The author of Cradle to Cradle discusses design and how to rethink how we build our products and cities in order to save and enjoy the world. Check it.

The Future of Body Care is Futurenatural Baby

2008-05-14T21:57:00.004-04:00

Also, glamazon ladies out there, check out this new website PLEASE!!! If you like Sephora, but are eco-conscious and want to put only the best, purest, organic products in and on your body, Futurenatural.com is the way to go!

Founder Emma Pezzack was interviewed by Current TV about the mission and purpose of this fabulous new company.

We often forget that our skin is our largest organ and absorbs everything we put on it. If we are concerned about putting chemicals into our body, we must also be concerned with what we put ON our body. Emma does a ridiculous amount of research about their products and tests everything. Anything on their site is top quality in all areas. Check it!

Wedding Season

2008-05-14T18:26:00.003-04:00

photo credit: www.cartier.com

I don't know if anybody else noticed--but it's wedding season. I myself am in one for my best college girl next week and am going to a shower for another couple tomorrow. That's this month alone.

Not to get all Carrie Bradshaw on everybody, but I have mixed feelings about wedding season. On the one hand, the joy and love that accompany such a day is so incredibly refreshing. On the other, that nagging feeling that I should be up at the alter too doesn't ever quite fade away completely.

It's not that I want to get married. I don't. Well--let's clarify, I don't want to get married now. The idea of finding a man I am so head over heels in love with that I just don't know what to do with myself is incredibly appealing in theory. It's just that I know I'm a massively long way from being there right now. You know that State Farm commercial (The one where everybody is "so there")? I'm it's anti-thesis.

I'm so not there.

What is there? That good ol' peer pressure--even in this day and age where getting married later in life is perfectly OK, normal and common--to find somebody. Because if you haven't, then there must be something off about you right?

Wrong.

There is nothing awry with this little girl. I'm just freakin' independent as hell and have high enough standards to stay away from Mr. Right Now. I don't have time for Mr. Right Now. Not because I'm spending it all in a hurry to find Mr. Right. Uh, hello! I've got a life to live and things to accomplish! I've got goals and plans and aspirations that don't involve a hubby (at least not on paper, because we all know the world has a crazy way of throwing the best laid plans askew and challenging you to fit things into the picture that weren't even on the horizon in the original vision).

But back to Mr. Right Now. I hate Mr. Right Now. Mr. Right Now is such a waste of time. Sure, it's nice to have a guy or two to go out on dates with. That you enjoy spending time with, but don't invest anything further into. That's all fine and dandy. But the guy (or girl) that you stay with because there isn't anybody else on your radar at the moment, and you can't handle being alone for more than two weeks, isn't somebody we should be staying with. Not only do we hold ourselves back, but we also hold them back. Not just from finding "the one," but from finding self-confidence, self-determination and self-awareness. While a triple braided cord may be stronger than the three alone, you are also only as strong as you weakest link. You have to make the individual parts strong if you want the entire cord, the relationship, to be strong as well.

Me? I'm in strength training mode baby. I'm learning so much about myself right now. I'm learning about what I believe in, what I am passionate about, what I want to do for the rest of my life. I am learning about my baggage and figuring out what I want to and need to leave behind in order to get to a new level of being. Cause, man oh man, am I ever ready for that level!

It just doesn't necessarily involve my soul mate. Or maybe it does. It's like a video game. There are all these levels and challenges to pass before you enter the next phase. In life, we play each level only once, and we never know what lies ahead--so maybe Mr. Right is there. But Mr. Right Now will surely be avoided. Don't want to get stuck in a level and become stagnant. Let me put it this way. There are some people who will call you crazy (and who have called me crazy), but we'd rather be crazy for the rest of our lives than apathetic for one single day, right?

So all you single ladies (and gentlemen), bury that feeling of insignificance despite the fact that you haven't come across a significant other. It's about as important as Mr. Right Now.

I.E. NOT VERY.

It's wedding season, yes. It might make you long for a soul mate of you own--and that's OK too. Who doesn't love the idea finding that person. Just remember that you are worth just as much single as you are married or committed. My Mom loves this mantra: I am holy, I am whole.

I am holy, I am whole. I am holy, I am whole...

Feeling Indecisive

2008-05-04T21:19:00.008-04:00

Voting is the ultimate way to use your voice. We know I love to use mine, so that should lead you to conclude there is no way I'll be skipping out on the polls this year. But I have a dilemma. The North Carolina presidential primary is Tuesday and damn it, I still don't know who I'm going to vote for. I'm sitting here with my voting guide, feeling frustrated that I can't make up my mind!!! I've been listening to speeches and debates and reading positions and meditating on it for months--and no luck. If I were less obsessed with democratic principle, I'd flip a coin, but I just can't bring myself to cop out. My damn and blessed democratic duty is stressing me out.

Maybe (hopefully) my decision will come to me in a dream. They've been very telling on my inner workings lately. Or maybe I'll just have to buck up and make a hard choice. There is so very much at stake here. We are obviously at a crossroads as a nation. We absolutely need to make a good decision this go around or things could go from bad to worse very quickly.

I'm worried about my country. I want it to be all it can be! We are so far from that now and I wonder if we can ever get there. But, as an ever-faithful, if not discerning optimist, I have to hope against all hopes, and the past eight years, that the American Dream is not dead. It does seem like we are entering a global period of soul searching, doesn't it? That we simply need to go on a quest and reclaim our identity. We know what it's supposed to be, but we haven't done such a bang up job of living up to the lofty principles we claim to hold so dear.

Choices are not always easy, but I keep coming back to the fact that we are so incredibly blessed to have them. We have to hold on to the right to make them with everything we've got. The erosion of the public voice and role in making complex decisions with great impact on our nation and the world is a worrisome and quietly occuring phenomenon. But it doesn't have to be. Our votes have the potential to put a protector of those rights into the highest office and set the tone for the rest of the system.

Millions around the world lay down their lives for the right to choose (and thousands of our own soldiers risk their lives to protect it--however misguided their superiors are). I'm still feeling indecisive, but also grateful. Despite some major issues, what a great country this is that we live in! Let's not take that for granted. Let's get out there and vote for growth and positive change and for putting our principles at the forefront of our politics.

Now, which candidate will get us there? Damn good question. I'll have to get back to you on that one.

Happy Voting North Carolina!

New Forum For My Big Voice!!!

2008-05-01T21:31:00.003-04:00

Hey all! My first post on Charlotte's hottest new blog, CLT Blog, is officially up!!! Check it out please! And check out the rest of the blog too if you've got time. There are some very very talented people up in our space!

Hot Time, Estelle Is In The City

A Must-Read On This Lovely Saturday Afternoon

2008-04-26T16:38:00.002-04:00

P.S. Awesome article! Really hits the complexity of the issue (though unfortunately the EU isn't addressing the matter of emissions and resources used in production of food--but it's a step in the right direction). Read UP!

The Environmental Cost of Shipping (NY Times)

Proud Mama

2008-04-26T15:59:00.005-04:00

Today I stood up for my right to reasonably priced produce and got myself some plants. That's right, I've got a nano-farm going on my back porch. Until now I've only attempted bamboo, since I seem to have inherited the Black Thumb of Death from my mother (thanks Mom), but I like to think I'm the adventurous type, so I'm going for it. I'm keeping it simple to start (don't want to push my horticultural luck): Porch tomatoes purchased from a local vendor at the organic farmer's market here in Charlotte, organic cilantro, peppermint and basil starters to boot.

I'm pretty excited seeing I spend at least $15-20 a week on tomatoes and herbs (I seriously eat tomatoes at every meal except breakfast). That means within two weeks of "harvest", I'll have paid for my investment. The thought of my little babies bearing too many tomatoes for me to eat all by my lonesome is so lovely. I can't wait to give people baskets full as mid-summer's day presents.

I'm also reading a fascinating, though frightening book to further my education on GM foods--Genetically Modified foods that is. They are more prevalent than we think and the laws governing their use and safety are slack at best. But I digress. The book is called Uncertain Peril (By Claire Hope Cummings) and it's been a really great read so far. I did a lot of research my freshman year in college on this subject, but I was looking at it from an international perspective and only touched on U.S. policy surrounding the matter. Having gorged myself with the illustrious Vandana Shiva and the like, I feel like it's time to learn about how the U.S. currently handles these products (for my own health and well-being) and also how we can create change through our actions (how and where we spend our dollar, who we vote into office, etc.). This is a subject that a lot of people are unaware of (and that's certainly a conscious act by those involved in GM production) and can really affect our nation's economy and consequently our global economy. Not to mention the very obvious risks posed to our health by the inadequate research done on the subject and laughable laws in place to keep our food safe. I urge each and every one of you to look into the matter. You'll be shocked (or maybe
expecting) to find that the government has hardly any measures in place to keep us safe in this regard. Remember Dolly the cloned sheep and the issues she had? Well genetically altered food has the same propensity to fail us, but nobody mentions that on their packaging.

But I digress again. I really must be off! It's been a busy, busy weekend already and it isn't even half over! I'll be sure to post pictures when my babies started producing!!!

Living The Difference--Everyday Earth Day

2008-04-21T23:37:00.003-04:00

Earth Day is like Valentine's Day to me--a great time, but shouldn't we be celebrating it everyday? While one day a year is a great way to bring awareness to the issue, it's also quite obvious that we need to be living these values year-round. Saving the earth isn't that hard to do, if we each commit to doing the little things.

My grandpa always said, "don't sweat the small stuff." On the opposite side of that, it's the little things that matter when it comes to the environment. They add up in a big way--for better or for worse. So let's make some real changes this Earth Day. Let's each make a commitment--like a New Year's resolution. It will be a New Earth resolution. Are you with me?!?!

My New Earth resolution is to cut down my shower time to five minutes. It's absolutely amazing how much water we waste in the shower and I am one of the biggest culprits. I love a good long shower with lots and lots of steam, but think about this: In just two minutes an average of 10 gallons of water is used. That's as much as many people around the world use in an ENTIRE DAY!!! And they have walk miles to get it. I read this in "The Green Book" the other day and it really got to me. Yeah, I enjoy a long shower, but shaving off just a few minutes makes such a difference in the long term (the math: 5 less minutes = 25 less gallons per day = 9, 125 gallons in a year--whoa!).

This Earth Day, it's time to enact some more changes for this little girl. If you aren't quite ready to give up shower time, make a commitment to bring your own organic cotton bags to the grocery store instead of taking paper or plastic. Or maybe buy a Sigg bottle and give up bottled water. There are so many things you can do without real sacrifice that it seems silly NOT to manifest a positive change for the health of our world.

I wish you all a magnificent Earth Day--which basically translates to a magnificent everyday. Live the difference people! Live the difference!

Extra! Extra! We've Got Good News!

2008-04-18T18:20:00.005-04:00

While the newspapers keep talking of recession for the U.S. economy, the Waggoner family's spiritual economy is still going strong in the growth category. If you're tired of doomsday and depression (or maybe just recession), now hear this: We've got good news to share!

Yesterday was a really great day! I mean REALLY great. My Aunt Beth and Uncle Jan-Willem have been waiting in the adoption lines for a while now--but the stalemate has broken! Around 4:30 p.m., they got the call that a real live little boy is waiting for THEM.

Little Tae-Hun is officially the cutest little thing I've ever seen. I had to cover my squeal of joy when that giggling little human being popped up on my screen at the office. I think you'll all agree! Please see evidence of cuteness below.

I rest my case. So even though both parties have a few more months to wait before being united in Seoul, we are all pretty freakin' pumped about the whole thing!

It's amazing the level of instant positive energy that a baby brings to a family. Their fresh little souls seem to have a purifying effect on us all. They remind us of all the possibilities we have in front of us today--that each day is new and full of exciting things we've never seen before. Plus they are so intuitively loving! And the feeling's mutual. I can't even explain the love that swells up inside me every time I look at the little tyke. It's absolutely amazing and so is he.

BAM! little girl l BIG VOICE Hits The City!

2008-04-14T20:16:00.007-04:00

Coming soon to a computer near you! You can now follow your favorite loud-mouthed little girl on yet another forum. As if lg I BG, Studio 1000, Facebook, MySpace, Give It To Me Raw, G Living and Twitter weren't enough, I'll be joining the crew of CLT Blog--an awesome new site run by some inspiring young artists and journalists here in Charlotte--to report on the bad-ass social scene in the Queen City. I'm super pumped to be a part of this group and get in on the positive energy swirling around this creative venture. I have a feeling my social life is going to kick itself up a notch--BAM! So stay tuned! I'm sure I'll much to share about my favorite Southern city and our ever-occurring crazy adventures here!

HAPPY NEW BEER'S EVE!!!

2008-04-11T21:14:00.022-04:00

Last Sunday was the celebration of New Beer's Eve, the 75th anniversary of the day when the prohibition tide began to turn and beer went back to a potent 3.2% alcohol content!

Sameer thought I would have something to say about this and I do--mostly that I'm really glad we aren't still in prohibition! Man do I love a good bottle of organic California pinot grigio or an exotic Northwest micro brew. Thank God for April 7, 1933 and FDR's push to re-introduce legal alcohol back into the system. Not only did it give our flagging, depressed economy a boost, but it also ensured that millions of hard working Americans, just like me and you, can kick their feet up on Friday night and enjoy a nice Gin and Tonic (or whatever the drink of your choice may be). A quick story to commemorate the day.

I remember this time, right after I had turned 21 (I'm talking a few weeks here), that I brought home the leftovers of a six-pack of some yummy mirco brew from a night out with my friend Tiffany and our dank Oregon crew. I didn't think twice about putting it out in the fridge. I was 21, right!? Maybe not.

Let me give you some background on my family. Dad is an ordained minister, as is my uncle. Most of my family are elders at their churches or at the very least passionate and committed attendees. It should be pretty obvious that we aren't big drinkers. In fact, a lot of them don't drink at all (my parents do drink, but modestly). So little Bethany--the first child of the generation on both sides of the family--being into any sort of alcoholic beverage would be a little out of the norm. Most likely even frowned upon.

You get the picture. Back to the story.

Well, the next day my dad comes in from the garage, with the six-pack in his hands, asking who the beers belong to.

I wish I had an audio file of the reaction I had inside my head to record my brief panic internal panic attack. It went something like this:

"OMG. WHY AM I SO STUPID!!?? WHAT WAS I THINKING PUTTING BEER IN THE FRIDGE!!?? It's too soon! TOO SOON. WHY?! WHY?! WHY?! Ahhhhh what do I say?"

Meanwhile, though time had slowed enough for this entire conversation to run through my head in 0.2 seconds, Dad was waiting for an answer.

So I said, sheepishly (and yes I realize putting together me and sheepish is a complete oxymoron, but it did in fact happen), "mine..."

"Oh. Cool. I thought it was Tiffany's and I really wanted one," said Dad.

[jaw drops...waves of relief begin crashing over me]

"So can I have one?"

"Uh...yeah of course," croaked my uncharacteristically meek voice.

Whew. That was close. I guess Dad is cooler than I thought.

Now when I go home we go to Trader Joe's and love picking out new brews to try together.

It's like father-daughter bonding for the 21st century.

HAPPY NEW BEER'S EVE DAD!!! MUAH! Can't wait to try some new brews with you this summer!

And P.S. Next week is Charlotte's Creative Loafing's Beer Week. Come out and join us!!!

The Feisty Girl Is Getting Feasty!!!

2008-04-03T13:23:00.006-04:00

I've been tossing around the possibility in my head for a while--but today I made the official decision after reading Penni from Tulsa's blog, Real Juice Daily. I'll be doing a juice feast when I come home to Oregon.

Today Penni was talking about metamorphosis and the vast changes she feels her mind l body l spirit undergoing during her feast. Her current experience couldn't be further from what I am personally going through. I've come to realize I'm overloaded, uninspired by work and in desperate need of metamorphosis (and not Kafka style) myself. An intuitive need for "something" led me to find the raw food lifestyle and my intuition seems to again be leading me toward a life changing process--to go further down the rabbit hole. The real person in here is being held down by a great many things and it's high time that I unburden her and allow her to rise to the surface.

I've chosen summer because I know that back in Oregon I will have access to really good, fresh organic/local produce and, perhaps more importantly, a genuinely supportive community. Like many people I spend most of my day at work--but my work community would make it very hard for me to get all the positive things out of the experience. They have a hard enough time grasping the idea of raw. I think they might call a full-fledged intervention on me if I started juice feasting. I mean, it's a huge ordeal when I make a simple salad in the kitchen at lunch!

Like--"What is this?! It's not fried, doesn't come out of a plastic wrapper and doesn't go into the microwave to get toxified before gorging it into my protesting stomach? Why would you want to eat that crap?"

Uh, cause it's healthful, it won't give me cancer or make me obese. It tastes good, is full of nutrients and energy...Oh and did I mention it won't make me obese or give me some crazy disease I can't pronounce?

My family on the other hand-- really, "my Oregon" on the other hand--is always loving, always supportive and even if they don't quite get it--you can bet they will be behind me 100%.

So I'm sitting here at work, sipping a vibrantly green bowl of spicy coconut avocado soup (which got some confused and wary looks from co-workers on their way to Bojangles or Pizza Hut) with mustard greens for dipping and craving the start date for the little girl l BIG VOICE Juice Feast. I'm about to start a countdown on my page.

WAHT A WEEK: MONEY TALKS, WALK SCORE AND CAROLINA CUP

2008-04-01T13:55:00.002-04:00

April Updates and Musings...

1) EXTRA EXTRA: I'm adding a subscription button to the STUDIO 1:000 site, so please subscribe and keep up with us!

2) INSPIRATION IN THE WORKS: Pangea Day is May 10 (more to come on this) and I am in the beginning stages of planning an event for the Charlotte area. For those of you here in the Queen City with us, please stay tuned and make plans to spend the day with an inspired group of people ready to change our world for the better!

3) MONEY TALKS: The New York City Council has voted to put in place a Congestion Tax, which will charge drivers going in between boroughs for their choice to commute. A bummer for those already commuting, but a necessary policy in this little girl's opinion. Higher gas prices haven't yet stopped the carbon hemorrhaging in our country and the only way, it would seem, to get people out of fuel inefficient cars and into public transit is to make it less and less affordable to drive. I can't help but wonder if a similar policy in driving-heavy cities like Atlanta and Charlotte would do to improve their resident's quality of life...I know I would definitely be down for some better public transit for my commute. $50 for a unlimited pass? Or $50+ each time I fill up? Doesn't seem like a hard choice when you put it that way!

4) HORSES AT CAROLINA CUP?: I saw no horses this year, but hopefully I'll have pictures to post and stories to tell from last weekend's escapades. Whew, what a doozy! Thank God we had Daddy Doug and Jeannie to feed us and keep us out of the rain. You'd have thought we were in Oregon with the 50 Degree windy drizzle that was entirely UNWELCOME by the crowd.

5) Check out you "walk score" at their nifty website. They calculate how walkable your home is from all the places you'd want to go nearby. Mine was 40, though I proved all the amenities of Uptown are closer than one thinks from our house on the edge of it. Remember, no more driving on the weekend! If I can do it in NASCAR country, so can you!

Temporary Web Space

2008-03-31T14:17:00.001-04:00

Check out my new temporary website that will act as my online portfolio while I'm having one built for my company, STUDIO 1:000.

http://studio1000.blogspot.com/

It's pretty bare right now, but will have more in terms of content very soon!

Enjoy!

Charlotte Cats Route 7

2008-03-26T23:26:00.008-04:00

Mid-March Resolution: No driving on weekends. God, to be in a city better suited to public transportation! A city where it wouldn't take you two hours and 4 transfers to get to work. But since this is not the case until August--when hopefully the London Underground will carry me from place to place--I've resolved to get a head start on my future living situation and put my car keys away Friday through Sunday. I started last weekend and although I had a little adventure locking myself out of the house due to leaving my keys at the grocery store (two miles away--that I had just walked!!!), I can say that I really enjoyed trekking around Uptown in the warmness of Spring.

So Viva La Revolution de reduction du mon"Carbon Footprint".

OK, yes my french was awful. Maybe I can use my newfound weekend walking time to catch up with some free language podcasts...

Roller Derby in One Word: Awesome

2008-03-18T22:22:00.008-04:00

Roller derby's are basically kick ass. I got my first look at Charlotte's women's roller derby team, the Charlotte Roller Girls, on Sunday and I was so inspired by these very tough and very charismatic women.

They seriously know how to take a hit. Now, being a libero, I know a little something about throwing yourself at the mercy of a cold hard floor. I've had many an affair with hardwood courts all over the country, although the Winthrop Coliseum and I could be said to have a very significant and long term relationship. I have the scars to prove it.

But these ladies were on skates and careening themselves around a concrete track at a very fast pace, alongside 20 other women determined to maintain dominance. Needless to say (though as usual, I'll say it anyway), there was a lot of cheering every time somebody went down. It was just like grade school. Every fight is the coolest thing ever--until the next one.

But I'm a lover, not a fighter. So I'll just give a final shout out to these ladies and say that I'm pretty pumped to be writing an article for Rejuvenate Magazine about them. And that I'm pretty sure I'll be coming to the next home bout in May.

My Top 5

2008-03-16T22:22:00.012-04:00

I'm "it" to the third power. I guess I'm a very taggable person. Three times. One week. I don't have enough friends with blogs to tag back. But I'd be a bad friend if I didn't fulfill my end of the tag, so I'll at least give you five things you might not know about me.

1. I played volleyball in college for the Winthrop University Eagles. I was the libero and we won four straight conference championships in my years there (they actually won one more after I finished playing, but I can't take any credit for that one!). I also was honored to serve on the NCAA Division I Student-Athlete Advisory Committee for three years with some of the most awesome people in Division I. On the committee we met to discuss student-athlete issues, voice our concerns, lobby the membership and ensure the well-being of our peers.

2. My mom says that I was born running (I evidently was such a prodigy that I skipped walking all together. TOO SLOW!) and singing. I knew all the words to just about every Disney movie and all the Columbia House old school musicals in my grandparents collection. I loved singing SO MUCH that I used to excuse myself from the table at restaurants to go sing in the bathroom. Have you ever tried this? The acoustics are really quite amazing! Something about the tile floors and metal stalls makes any five year old feel like Mariah Carey. And yeah, I was totally belting out some Heart Breaker to be sure.

3. I used to be a coffee addict. I think I was destined to love the stuff. I'd go and smell the bins at the grocery store growing up. Some kids go for the candy isle, I liked the caffeine isle! I started actually drinking it my sophomore year in high school when I had swim training for sprints before my 7 AM class every day. Let me tell you that I loved me some espresso. I even had coffee lip balm. Now I'm a green smoothie addict and feeling much healthier, thank you. Though I'm not going to lie that I miss a quad Black Tiger espresso at Coffee People like freakin' crazy.

4. My dream job is to trek through jungles, deserts, flood plains, whatever, to tell a story that needs to be told. If that means travelling with a rebel army in Sudan to photograph refugees so the world understands the severity of the situation, well, guess I'd better be getting some shots and a visa.

5. Give me a funky base back beat and I will be out on the dance floor before you notice I'm gone from your side (that is unless you are also a dance addict and are already out on the floor with me). I want to be up at the speaker, I want the base to vibrate within me and then I want to break it down! And I mean DOWN. Hell yeah!

Classic Scenario: New Year's Eve 2007/2008. I ran a half marathon for this Nike Challenge I was doing (150 Miles in one month). Went home, stretched it out, put a bit of nourishment into the system and headed out to rage with the Eugene Gaia Tribe crew for 10 hours of the best party energy you'll feel on the West Coast. Mom picked me up at 7 AM and we drove from Eugene up to Portland for me to fly out to Charlotte. Playing on my iPod the entire trip were burned copies of the night's jams. I was dancing all through the DFW and in the airplane bathrooms. I think I have a weird connection with bathrooms? They seem to inspire my creative expression.

So there you go people! Five things I love about me! Like I said above, all my blog friends have tagged me or been tagged, so I'll have to wait to pass this on until I can remember or find some new ones, LOL!

What's Next? Organic Tobacco And Purgatory For Environmental Offenders?

2008-03-12T23:08:00.006-04:00

Oh wow. Some good stuff went down today. You're in luck. I am feeling MUCH better after a few under-the-weather days, definitely more feisty and opinionated! Here's my list of favorite things that happened over the last 24 hours.

1. I read on Treehugger.com that The Pope, yes The Holy See himself, has officially declared pollution and crimes against the environment to be sins. Yup that's right! BALLA! Remember that verse from Genesis (I know it's hard, dig back to those Sunday School days or click on the link) that yakked on and on about God entrusting the care of the Earth and all its pieces and parts (i.e. the environment and all living things) to Adam (i.e. humanity)? Well turns out he/she kind of meant it. So it stands to reason that fossil fuel binges and the dumping of toxic nuclear waste weren't a part of what God looked around and saw as good.

Now even if you don't subscribe to a Judeo-Christian point of view, or any religious point of view for that matter, it's common sense to take care of the house that you live in if you want it to last. And the thing that so many also forget, in this ME l I l MINE centered society, is that we all affect each other. That's the theme of Globalization: Interconnectedness. Essentially, in many ways, we probably have more control over the lives of others than our own. If we only focus on ourselves, the negative toxicity of selfish living is going to come full circle and bite us in the butt.

We've got to accept that it's now an US l WE l OUR Earth, culture and future. The sooner we do this, the better, as the alternative doesn't look good. Plus the Pope said so.

2. I was browsing through Charlotte's popular news magazine Creative Loafing today and ran across this ad. It seems that the pressure being exerted by the Green Movement has now reached even Big Tobacco. HILARIOUS isn't it? This is greenwashing at it's best (worst?).

Hey you, our cigarettes are more natural! So even though you'll get cancer and die a slow horrible death, you won't inhale all those nasty pesticides and won't be hurting the Earth--just your own lungs and the hearts of all your friends and family.

It's almost too much. Almost too ironic. I am crying and laughing hysterically at the same moment. Get a load of the copy:

But I'm an optimist, so I have to acknowledge the positive realization that I got out of this. This ad, and ones like it, show the powerful effect those of us pushing for genuinely greener products and services are having on the market place. It starts with the greenwashing, but at some point the wolf gets caught and the sheep's clothing either becomes certifiable organic bamboo cloth or the wolf goes home with sagging profits and no demand for it's stinky costume.

3. After work I went on the nicest walk in my neighborhood park. The fresh air and warm weather rejuvenated me to the fullest extent. Sitting in an office day in and day out wears on me--all I want to do is take a quick trip down the road to the running trails and skip the afternoon of the work day. So today I revelled in the later sunset and took advantage of our park. And guess what I found?! A SWING SET!!! Oh, you can't even understand my joy! I sat there and swung for a good 15 mintues. I slipped into a meditation inside the rhythm of the push/pull flow and it was simply put, freakin' awesome.

Tomorrow's Agenda: Cyber-Blog Tag. I've been tagged it by two fellow bloggers and I guess it's about time I was a good sport and played along!

I'm A Druggie.You're A Druggie. We're a Druggie All. And we didn't even know it.

2008-03-10T23:46:00.005-04:00

OK, you have to read this. I'll give you a few minutes and then you hit me back and let me know if you feel as outraged as I do.

YEAH. I know!

It's just one thing after another. And I don't know about you, but I'm not too keen on the idea that I may be building up trace amounts of Viagra in my system because Charlotte's water could be laced with pharmaceuticals. Now granted, at least we have water that is safe to drink in the short term. We aren't going to get malaria or dysentery from consuming it, but still--isn't it frustrating to know we have so little control over the matter? What are they going to do? Make home reverse osmosis systems that produce much more polluted water than they provide in clean H2O (that will really help toward reducing my negative impact on the earth--not wasteful at all)??? Or create little tester strips for all the different drugs out there on the market?

With that in mind, I urge you to join in World Water Day 2008--not only for all the people in Africa and Asia and South America who lack access to potable water, but also for us Americans who are poisoning ourselves and each other with too many prescription drugs. There are several city walks sponsored by Ethos Water, but if there isn't one near you, you can opt to do a cyber-walk like me! Visit the Ethos link to join me in the quest for disease and drug free water!!!

Orange Cacaochino Ready For Gulping!

2008-03-01T10:54:00.007-05:00

March Madness has officially arrived. Today Winthrop plays UNC Asheville for first place in Men's Basketball in the Big South Conference (the NCAA Athletic Conference I work for)--plus it's homecoming at Winthrop so it should be a crazy game! Our Men's Basketball tournament starts next week as well, so it's their last chance to secure the one seed and the chance to host all rounds at their house.

Needless to say--though I guess I will anyway--all the staff at the Big South are going to be working at warp speed through this month. We're going to need a lot of energy to pull everything off, so what better to get us going then some yummy cacao?

Well I couldn't think of anything better, so I set about concocting a refreshing and energizing shake for me to take when we are all running around trying to maintain some semblance of ordered chaos.

The idea popped into my head some time ago for a Raw version of Starbucks Orange Frappachino. I love the combination of orange and chocolate, but I've always been disappointed in their execution of this concept. Their frappachino is heavy and extremely high in calories. I can't have more than a sip without my stomach rejecting the extreme sweetness.

My version not only gives you a kick of refreshing energy and nutrients from the cacao, but it has protein and good fats from almond milk and also vitamin C from the whole oranges used in it.

I find this seemingly sinful treat to be a really energizing way to start this beautiful spring day here in Charlotte. The sun finally has some warmth behind its rays and I have been basking in it all morning.

Here is the recipe for your enjoyment. You'll notice that I'm not exactly a precise "chef." I prefer to go along and make things to taste. Use your own best judgement and go with your instincts about what your body wants.

ORANGE CACAOCHINO

Make a batch of almond milk. I use Ani Phyo's recipe for vanilla milk:

1/2 cup of almonds
1/2 cup of pitted dates (or 2 tablespoons-ish of raw agave)
1 vanilla bean (or 2 teaspoons-ish of alcohol-free vanilla)
Dash of sea salt to taste
* Good sized pinch of cinnamon
* 3 Cups water

*Here's where I change up her recipe a bit for this particular use of the milk. I like to put cinnamon in my almond milk, so I add a good sized pinch. I also lower her recommendation of 5 cups water to 3 cups. This is to keep the consistency of the smoothie thick.

Next grind up some Cacao nibs. I use my coffee grinder for this and it works extremely well. Grinds it into a fine powder just like it would espresso. I start with about a half a cup of nibs and then add more if I feel like it needs it. It depends on how chocolaty you want this to be, so add to your taste.

Finally peel 2 oranges and add to the mixture. I like to leave some of the pith on for nutritional value, but not too much because it can leave a bitter residual taste in the drink--never a good thing!

Now, BLEND TO YOUR HEART'S CONTENT!!! And serve in a lovely high ball glass for all your friends and family (and of course YOU) to enjoy!

Note: If you don't like your smoothies grainy, strain using a colander. I don't like to use the nut milk bag, because it takes away some of the thickness. I used a mesh strainer and capture the large pieces of pulp and nut grinds for later use in brownies or whatever. You can also add crushed ice post straining if it's really hot where you are to add a zesty chill to the mix!

Hope you all enjoy this delicious treat! Let me know how it goes for you and any creative adaptations you make!

Back In A Jif!

2008-03-01T08:55:00.005-05:00

I always know when I'm slacking on the blog, because Dad will call me out on it! So I'm back in the saddle again Dad!

Here's a preview of the day... I'm about to go make this Orange Cacaochino I've been concocting for the last several weeks. If you think Starbucks' Orange Frappachino is heaven then you will love this alternative! There is no coffee in it, but it's got at least two things on Starbucks' version.

1) It's light, creamy and refreshing, rather than heavy and saccharin sweet
2) It's actually GOOD for you--not just "light" as in "less bad" for you, this baby is nutritious! No 750 calories of pure fat added to my bootie here.

So I'm off to put some final touches on the recipe and I'll be back in a jiffy (which I found out randomly in the bathroom stall at a club last night is an actual unit of time, 1/100 of a second to be precise)!

lg l BV

Breaking News

2008-02-17T09:44:00.006-05:00

Some updates...

1) There was a break re: our break-in and some of our property was recovered!!! Not exactly sure what they found (phone tag with the cops is so much fun!), but hoping that my SLR and iPod are are included!

2) New website hopefully will be coming soon. I am meeting today with a designer that will, with any luck, do work for me for a very low price or some sort of trade for photographic skills! Once it's up and running, it will be my professional showcase for writing, web content and photography.

3) I started a second job. Since moving on "up" to the uptown area in Charlotte, our rent has gone up too! So I started a second job as a media assistant with a team of realtors. I work mostly weeknights, so if I'm hard to get a hold of in those formerly good phone date times, I apologize, but a girl's gotta eat!

4) My crackberry is in the mail (for those of you who have heard my "leftover martini + cell phone do not = love" story, you know this is a long time coming!!!). So even though you might not be able to get a hold of me via voice, you'll be able to reach me more often via email and text. Just don't expect an email response at 2 AM. I'm won't be THAT accessible (I say that now...)!

5) I've been eating raw for about a month and a half now and cannot express the profound impact this change has had on me. You know when you stumble across something and it just clicks? It resonates with your soul and you have to go along for the ride. This is one of those things for me. I feel the clouds clearing and a more productive conscious coming through. I've made so many great friends as a result; friends who care about the earth and social justice in similar ways. This has been an area where I have always struggled--finding people who share these views and who are passionately living to make positive change without being overzealous or judgmental about it. To put it plainly: I've found my people.

6) I'm going to see "There Will Be Blood" today and I'm totally pumped!!! Been trying to see it for about a month now and I can't wait. V. v. interesting premise. Plus I love Daniel Day Lewis. Hopefully it lives up to the $5 I'm shelling out in matinee ticket bucks!

7) I hope you all had very a happy Valentine's Day, whether you were with your sweetie or went our with other singles as I did. But let's take it a step further and make every day a love day. After all, Valentine's Day is just another day. It's like fine china. What's the point of having it if you just leave it in the cupboard 99% of the year. Stop waiting around for a "special occasion" and use it! Stop waiting around for the holidays to love each other and spread joy to the world and do it today!

Ok, sorry. The soapbox just appeared in front of me and you know this little girl, I'm hardly ever able to resist.

Much love from North Cack-A-Lack!

Breakfast, Lunch, Can't Wait For Dinner!

2008-02-10T15:11:00.001-05:00

When the food looks this good, how can one resist? Don't look to me for an answer. I guzzled and munched down these bad boys with speed and gusto! Now, what to prepare for dinner?

Sunset Smoothie W/Mango and Raspberries

Wilted Kale & Arugala Salad W/Grape Tomatoes, Pine Nuts and Curry Vinaigrette Dressing

Who do you think you are, Mr. Big Stuff?

2008-02-05T21:22:00.000-05:00

I promised a happier post and hopefully I can make good on it. My mood today is, well, much better than before the weekend. Not because the Giants won the Super Bowl or because it's Super Tuesday (though I am pretty excited to see the the complete results when I wake up tomorrow), but because I was able to manifest through some rough stressful patches this afternoon with no caffeine and the simple mantra of, "get over yourself."

I've been using this mantra for a while now. I can't remember where I picked it up, but it's really quite useful. This is a selfish world we live in, isn't it? It's all about ME l I l YOU. Not enough focus on us. I get so frustrated with people who go about their lives not caring about how their decisions affect everyone else. There is a time and place for those kind of decisions, but that doesn't mean it should be all about me 24/7. We've seen how that goes. Exhibit A: Paris Hilton. I rest my case.

None of us are perfect. I think most would say they get pulled into their own problems more than they should at times. When I feel unmotivated or whiney I have to give myself a kick in the ass to remember that I live in a interconnected world and that my slacking could make somebody else's life that much harder.

GET OVER YOURSELF LITTLE GIRL!!!

There are so many things we cannot control for ourselves in life, and yet our actions constantly make direct impacts on others. My goal is to make that impact positive, whether we are talking about the environment, my office, my relationships or my politics. And I will keep working to get over myself and into each other. I hope you will too. This is the kind of theory that works like degrees of separation, except it's degrees of positive connectivity. We are all so much closer than we think!

Was that a positive enough message? I feel like it kind of had a silver lining around it. Alright it wasn't manic, but since it also wasn't depressive, I'll just have to live with the fact that, at least for today, I managed to get over myself in a big way.

Why Can't Life Be Like TiVo?

2008-01-31T21:41:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I wish I had a fast-forward button for life. Especially when I'm moving for the 7th time in six years. And even more so when I'm moving to a condo on the third floor.

The condo is gorgeous! The stairs are the most hideous thing I've ever seen. My suitcases screamed out, "Oh no! Not that! Don't carry me up these horrid things!"

But I did and now I sit here in an almost empty room, pilfering wireless from some unsuspecting and hopefully understanding new neighbor, ready to start over again. This time it really feels like the end of an old era and the beginning of a new one. Maybe it's just the New Year catching up to me now that it's almost February, but I feel like I've finally entered adulthood, the transition having ended sometime when I wasn't looking.

I wonder what will happen in the next year. I wonder if I will make it to London (GOD I HOPE I DO!!!) and if I will find a place for myself there. I wonder what my job will be and who I will love (other than the obvious people who have already earned a place in this little girl's heart).

It's like looking out at a calm sea on a beautiful morning. You know that so much lies beyond your view; that you are only capable of seeing it if you jump in and start swimming. And, of course, one must expect turmoil, rough seas and challenges.

Upon admitting this, I often find myself asking: Am I ready to take them on? Or will I find myself drowning in the sea of possibilities? Overwhelmed by the sheer vastness of what I am capable of doing, rendering me unable to actually do any of it?

Hmmm. Well that's not depressing now, is it?

I guess I'll have to write a super uplifting post on Monday when this particular storm has past, rather than try to fake it today, when it is looming on the horizon. I've got to go now, and get through it somehow. Just like every past storm. Just like every future one.

Where there is a Will, there is a way. At least I've got determination to a fault.

Say WHHHAAAT?

2008-01-29T22:23:00.000-05:00

Today I drove past a Starbucks and didn't get that urge to go in. It was one of those tiny moments with a lot of meaning for a girl like me.

Normally I drive past a Starbucks and you can bet your sweet bootie that I am in there even if it means I risk minor lateness. Just ask my professors. I think my saving grace was that they were usually in line with me. Sometimes a lecture is a lecture, even if you are the one giving it!

So does this mean that the love affair between coffee and this little girl is over? Not so much. Not yet.

I've simply become a less co-dependent. And I can't say that's a bad thing in which way.

Exponential Impact

2008-01-21T23:04:00.000-05:00

Please go check this dude out. Chris Jordan is an artist with a voice of such succinct vision! Using the cumulative power of small components to make a gigantic statement. More specifically, his creative flow makes clear a tangible snapshot of our own wastefulness. And when you look at it through this lens it is overwhelmingly inspiring.

It's so easy to make a difference if we all make even a small commitment. What if everybody bought a Sigg bottle and a water filter. Think of how many plastic water bottles we would keep out of the system! Think of the positive trickle down affect that would have on our world.

www.chrisjordan.com

He earns the little girl l BIG VOICE stamp of approval for sheezy!

Coming Soon: The "Vita-Cosmo" !!!

2008-01-11T17:06:00.000-05:00

Kudos Mom, Kudos to Jan Eliot for channeling my spirit in her comic strip. This has been me all week, trying to ward off the first cold of the winter.

Even funnier is that I went to a bar with some friends in Oregon and actually ordered water in a whiskey glass just so I could make an Emergen-C packet to go along with my usual Gin and Tonic. But damn it, never thought to combine the two! Such an obvious connection. A "Vita-Cosmo"? Sounds good to me. Maybe it'll be the next big thing!

I can copyright that name by dating this post right? Anybody?

2008-01-09T18:19:00.000-05:00

And so begins the presidential election bender (we’ve been in cocktail hour for sometime now). It starts off with a few tempting treats and they turn out to be so good, that you just have to have more. Then Super Tuesday rolls around and you stuff yourself on polls, analysis, second-by-second vote count updates with blog commentary attached, Anderson Cooper and high flatulent campaign promises out the whazoo.

By the time we get to North Carolina in May—let’s just be honest—we’ll know the outcomes of both primaries and the only reason the left-over states will actually have theirs is because they can (and law students, correct me if I’m wrong, but probably have to by constitutional mandate as well). Technically, every vote does count. It just really makes me want to whine, like only a four-year-old can, knowing that due to the mad dash for primacy in the primaries we saw in state congresses all over the country last year, my primary vote may not mean anything.

Or will it? Isn’t that the question we are searching to answer this election year?

“Do the voices of dissenting Americans really matter anymore?”

They mattered when patriots were fighting for freedom from the Crown. They mattered when Southern and Northern states locked heads in one of our world’s epic civil wars. They mattered when women stood up and demanded a vote and when Martin Luther King Jr. told us all about his dream.

But do they still matter today? Does that idea of one voice, one vote still mean something in our culture? It seems as though a lot of people in this country have grown cynical about their role in America. They remember from grade school that it’s supposed to be important (and that many died fighting for it), but I fear we may have grown so complacent and hopeless, that we have forgotten what a unique and noble foundation we have here—AND must to work to support. Think about all the work that our grandparent’s generation put into America. Work that we've
put to shame in this generation.

My musing has brought me to wonder: Are the people of Tom Friedman’s ever-flattening earth going to reach their tipping point this election year? Are they going to use the power they have found in the Internet and new media to make noise which cannot be ignored? And will they have the strength to make demands that carry enough weight to actually inspire political action over the course of the next presidency and beyond?

Are the American people angry enough—and hopeful enough to give this country a kick in the ass to get it going before things really do start to crumble?

We are at a very precarious point in our journey as a nation, one that may affect us for centuries to come. And all I can say is: God give us the courage to make tough choices, to stand for something positive again and to have the conviction to work tirelessly for everything we hope to see made real.

Fast As You Can = 20 Days 18 Hours and some change

2008-01-04T15:47:00.000-05:00

Well. I ran 15 miles on a treadmill for two hours on New Year’s Eve—but I made it. 150 in 20 days. Number 45 out of 765 and only one of 50 who actually finished.

Definitely more running than I’ve ever done in my life, college pre-seasons included.

And you know what?

I’m addicted.

After four very intense years in a high level Division I volleyball program, I found myself so burnt out on working out. I knew that I loved it. I craved that feeling you get after you’ve pushed yourself to a new level. But I couldn’t bring myself to do anything more than go through the motions.

It was, in truth, monumentally depressing to my spirit and my identity as an athlete seemed to be slipping away.

Moral of Story: Sometimes you click a mouse and get yourself into something that you didn’t pause to think through. IDIOT! SO STUPID! WHY! And then you realize the kicking your ass is going to get from that decision is exactly what you needed and you thank God, Elvis and Gandhi for your burst of impulsivity.

I’ve always said that I am too ambitious for my own good, but in this isolated case I think I will count that as a strength rather than a weakness of character.

Break Glass Ceiling--Check

2007-12-24T02:12:00.000-05:00

I finally broke the Top 100!!! Number 92! HOLLA!!!

A VERY big accomplishment since Oregon is not exactly being accomodating weather-wise. I think I would have been drier having jumped into a swimming pool than I was after my second run tonight. I was SO unmotivated to be anywhere other than on the couch with a glass of wine and A&E's Pride and Prejudice--all six hours of it!--on the TV. To see that the run from hell was the one that got me into my coveted number 92 spot is just such sweet satisfaction.

Stay tuned! I've got my eyes on breaking another ceiling and getting in the top 75 to finish!

It's only 10 miles a day--no big deal (HA!)

patience is not a virtue I possess

2007-12-20T15:54:00.001-05:00

Ugh. I am sitting at work, with nothing to do (for the first time in about 2 months)and no motivation to take any sort of initiative today. I would ask for work, but I also don’t want to get stuck alphabetizing the storage closet for the last two hours before our glorious 10-day holiday break, so I am attempting to lay low under the “Can You Do Me A Favor” radar and just get the hell out of here!

I am stoked for the Blue Light Special. I have built in snooze time to my morning routine and usually bask in the glorious 20 minutes of sleep indulgence that I take. It’s a mind trick, but one that works for me. This morning, however, there was no happy drifting back into sleep for a precious few minutes. No, this morning I was AWAKE! I tried my damndest to relax and take my snooze allocation, but nothing doing. I’m too excited and my body/sub-conscious just can’t forgo their impatience to be back in Oregon long enough for me to catch my ZZZs or get through work without looking at the clock and sighing at least once every 3 minutes.

And now I have exactly 2 hours and 21 minutes until I take my nightly run (still trying to get in the top 100 for the Jog Off That Nog Challenge) and head over to Therapy for a martini with the girls. Normally, I would consider myself a pretty mentally healthy person, but tonight I’ll take the therapy (I mean I’m obviously having anxiety issues to get on that plane and get back to Pacific Standard)—so long as it comes in the form of a very neat gin martini with a dish of extra olives.

I can seriously feel the cool slippery liquid sliding past my welcoming palate and into my tummy.

Two hours, 17 minutes.

I’m gonna need two martinis by the time I get out of here. I am so absolutely horrid at waiting.

No. 154

2007-12-19T10:31:00.000-05:00

Moved up again! YAY!

2 Days until Bethany's Oregon "Blue Light Special"!!!

Can't wait to visit and party with you guys!

No.163

2007-12-17T10:47:00.000-05:00

Still out of the top 100, but have improved 33 spots! Angel--you'd better be ready to go through doggie boot camp! Cause T-Minus 4 days until we test out that energy resource Mom has been bragging about.

P.S.

2007-12-13T23:12:00.000-05:00

I guess you also should know that I am like No.196 out of about a million and you can't actually see my times yet damn it! But when I catch up to the top 100, my name is "FastAsUCan". Just keep looking for me! I'll be there!

My Very Public Insurance Policy

2007-12-13T23:01:00.001-05:00

Ok people, I'm freakin' resolved, bound and determined to actually finish this 150 mile running challenge I've gotten myself into. The best way for me to guarantee this happening is to appeal to my pride and put my progress up for all to see. That way I can't back out or flake out when the going gets tough--as if it didn't get tough enough on that 8 mile run I took down Providence today. God those hills are killer--much worse than they look! I hope I can walk tomorrow, because I've got another 8 miles to do after work. Ah the life of an insanely ambitious 23-year-old woman.

Check it!

And another thing!

2007-12-11T13:29:00.000-05:00

And P.S.

What the hell is up with the weather here? It's like 80 degrees today?

I was unaware that I had moved 20 miles North and into the tropics? Or is Charlotte on the same winter schedule as Austrailia now?

It's seriously freaking me out. Temperatures that usually dictate tanning by the pool make it very difficult to get into the holiday spirit. The only kind of skiing you can do is water skiing (if we had any water that is--stupid drought) and bikinis are more applicable than the gorgeous winter coat I just bought and have worn about 3 times.

Point being: No making fun of me when I think that 50 degrees is freezing when I get home.

“Jog off the Nog Challenge” or “I’ve freakin’ lost my Nog-gin Challenge”?

2007-12-11T13:26:00.000-05:00

I think I just hit crazy.

Yes. I’m reasonably sure that I did. At about 7pm yesterday evening. When I got home from a run, sync-ed my iPod to Nike+ and found a challenge created by somebody in Oregon.

OREGON!!! YAY!!!

These were my first—very pleasant, very normal—initial thoughts. Click! I joined.

And then I looked at what I had done.

I am, as they say, an idiot.

Because I am now a member of a “150 miles in one month” challenge that I have to complete by December 31 and I have run about 12. That’s like 8 percent.

I am SUCH an idiot.

Because I’m not one of those reasonable people who would just get out of the group and let it go.

Oh no. I have to do it now. 7 Miles a day for 20 days. Ugghhhhh.

What’s more? Some woman named Kitty—get this---ran her’s in 10 days.

Show off.

She’s from Ohio. I just think they have a fixation with being number 1.

Yeah we’ll see how that goes without Greg Oden.

God I am such an idiot.

Double Agent's can be loyal too!

2007-10-26T17:06:00.000-04:00

It's official. I am no longer an Oregonian. After four hours of waiting at the DMV (LONG STORY) and three hydroplanes--in very Oregon-like driving conditions-- later, I am now a licensed driver, registered Democrat and organ donor in the state of North Carolina. I got 100% on my test--which I think was the shortest portion of my experience at the East Independence Department of Motor Vehicles Offices.

And though I am relieved to no longer be in possession of a "valid without photo" Oregon ID, I am quite remorse that I had to leave that piece of my Identity behind. I can now get into bars and on airplanes without harassment, but I won't get those little moments of wonderment with random strangers when they look and see I'm from a state that is 3000 miles and world of culture away. I love Charlotte and have been quite happy here, but I still have this nagging feeling that I've somehow betrayed my steadfast liberal roots and all the S.N.O.Bs. I wonder why the hell I've stuck around an environment full of people who think I'm crazy because I believe everybody should have access to health care or that recycling is worth the effort of putting that Coke can in a little red box rather than the big blue one.

I love where I'm at. I love the challenges and the experiences and my people here. But some days I wake up and it's raining just like it does down the I-5 corridor. And I'll be damned if I don't spend the day just wanting to go home.

Did You Miss Me???

2007-10-17T17:33:00.000-04:00

Well it's been a while, but I'm still here in the Queen City. Living it up! Making plans for London next year! I don't have a whole lot of time, since I am STILL computer-less (I'm not even going to go there with the insurance right now, because I still need good karma with them) and monopolizing office bandwidth to write this short notice of my continued existence. HOWEVER...I will have photographs up soon from the Avon Walk For Breast Cancer that is going on in Charlotte this weekend. Really looking forward to giving up my time and talent for a cause that has hit too close to home, one too many times for my clan. So check in next week for the whole she-bang and an update to-boot.

Peace.Love. Save The Whales.

B

A little bit more, a little bit more

2007-09-17T17:07:00.000-04:00

This is how poor I am. I made my entire house go without toilet paper for two days, because I left the coupon my office manager gave me at work over the weekend. And saving a whopping $1.50 is a big deal right now!

It's honestly depressing. I work 40+ hours, but am stuck with an intern's pay, while my friends work the same or less than I do and make double. I love where I work, but I can't shake the feeling that somehow the world is just being completely unfair when it comes to this issue!

It's injustice I tell you! At least it feels like it when I walk by a pair of shoes that are calling my name like two Greek sirens (though admittedly, the shoes are almost always decidedly Italian). It just feels like a frustratingly big ordeal when I can't have what I want when I want. Isn't that what my college education was for!

OK. Reality check. I've passed the shoes. I'm out of the Siren's range. And once again, I remember that my financial woes are ridiculously smaller and more petty than what Afghan women have to deal with. I don't have to beg in order to support my children. And I don't feel so helpless that dousing my body with kerosene and lighting a match feels like the only way to exert some control over my life--even if it means that I end it as a result.

Last night I stayed up watching a CNN special on the condition of Afghanistan since the US invaded. To put it mildly, my personal depression turned to deep gratitude. I can't afford an Acura TL and I don't have cash laying around for Coach purses or Burberry jackets, but I can pay my bills and walk in public without being ridiculed or oppressed. I'm allowed to speak my mind. My ideas and words are considered worthy by men and women alike. Hell, my boss even lets me wear my nose stud without question!

It seems as though it's human nature to always want just a bit more than what we have. At times this be a good thing. That "reaching for the stars" attitude pushes us, but if we aren't careful--if we don't allow ourselves to put a situation into perspective--it can also hold us back.

I wouldn't mind a little bit more, but I also realize that when looking at my life through the lens of greater part of the world's whole, the sum of my experience is really quite great.

Still. Can somebody remind me of all of this the next time there is a sale at Nordstroms that I dare not even make a mental note of, for fear of maxing out every last credit card?

No Joke: I can actually see the ass crack of dawn from this asana that I am currently in

2007-09-11T23:13:00.000-04:00

Man. I am so out of shape. Hopelessly. Pathetically. Unbecoming-of-my-athlete-status-ly. I am so freakin' out of shape.

And I'm not sure, but I think my chakras--while having temporarily agreed to stay open and at peace--are sore from the yoga I am attempting to do without throwing out my back. Is that even possible? For chakras to be sore? Somebody with scientific knowledge can correct me, but I swear on the great Buddha's right lotus blossom that mine are.

The best part (for you, not for me): I am getting up at 6:00 am to do it all again. You have full permission to laugh your own ass off at me now and call me nuts.

I already know that I'm crazy. But I'm also out of shape and the only way for me to get strong without having the thighs of a WWE/Body Builder/Sumo wrestler is to do less lifting and more yoga.

Maybe if I really go off the deep end, I'll mix in a little pilates while I'm at it. I can just hear my hamstrings crying, begging for mercy.

Though that begs the question: Are you even supposed to do yoga AND Pilate's? Aren't they inherently at odds? One: the lifestyle of the rich and spiritually lacking slash seeking some sort of assurance that they aren't completely selfish and greedy cause I do YOGA and/or the commune-seeking organic-eating raw-food-vegan-who still drinks tea-which technically is cooked-but gets away with it because their friends are all too damn high to care-hippie left-over and/or college wannabe. The other: the type-A control-freak who must discipline every aspect of their life right down to the very cells and strings which align to form their bodies in order to exist and not grow old b/c that would mean less ability-sharpness-and the all important-but never forgotten even at the end of this very long run on sentence-CONTROL.

Freaks.

Let go v. Hold on. Should be a good match between my lazy and increasingly soft muscle groups.

Or maybe I am just thinking about this entirely too much because my chakras really are freed up from the energy sun-moon link sequence that I completed this evening and my head won't turn off just quite yet. Not to mention that I probably really shouldn't judge, since half of the above judged as just a bit ridiculous qualities/characteristics/insecurities are in fact my very own.

So. See you at 6:00 if anyone wants to join my for a challenging advanced series. I'm sure the West Coasters are especially keen on being there at the East Coast's "Ass Crack of Dawn" with me and all my chakras.

But don't complain that I never invite you to anything.

Cry Me A River

2007-08-31T17:25:00.000-04:00

In my next life I will be independently wealthy. I will spend labor day in New York watching the US Open instead of in Charlotte cleaning my house and trying (god help me) to finally finish unpacking. I will more than likely end up doing everything but that neccessary task, but such is the life of a poor intern. No money to go exotic and fascinating places and no desire to accomplish the mundane tasks that need doing.

Have I cried you a big enough river yet?

On Being Old School...

2007-08-28T20:25:00.000-04:00

I was standing at the copy machine today--begging it to please please please do this one little favor for me-- and realized in a flash of insight how pathetically attached to technology we are. Call me crazy, but something's out of whack when your machines take on personalities of their own and you start talking to them like there is an acutal person standing in front of you.

As it happens, our copy machine is the worst. Yesterday she refused to hole punch or staple my supplements and crashed 5 minutes before our meeting--without printing the one page we needed. It was as if that chunky body of nuts, bolts, ink and toner was actually angry at the world and was going to tell us about it, like a teenager whose been told they are too young to go to a party or some other rubbish. Chad was forced to basically molest her in order to get a tiny scrap of paper released from her deepest recesses.

Not to mention my journey round the house this morning to find my mischvious and constantly missing USB-compatible card reader, so I could email the photos resting on my CF flashcard to my editor. No dice. I had to go to the drug store at lunch and convert the files onto a CD. Except the CD drive there wasn't working. Evidently the photo machine was having a bad day too. So I had to come back later when it was fixed and instead of emailing the photos at 10:00 am, it was dark before they arrived safe and sound in her inbox.

Whatever happened to the days of the one-hour photo counter and a stamp?

Well, I'll tell you straight up. They are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO long gone that it's ridiculous.
Those who attempt to hang on are scoffed at and constantly bombarded with demands to, "get with it". It's not so much about keeping up with the Jones's anymore as keeping up with the vast array of newer, brighter, bigger/smaller, and better.

But my drama filled experience with our copy machine has got me thinking that maybe they're on to something.

Maybe Grandma Polly is actually smarter than the rest of us for refusing to buy a digital camera and printing dock; instead, continuing to use old school Kodak and taking her film into WalMart by the load. Though Kodak soon won't even be making film, except for professional grade, she's held strong to her tangible way of doing things.

Maybe she's right and what you see should still be what you get. The iPhone is pretty sweet (so suculent to the human eye that I would probably give my left and right arms to have one). Blue tooth, wireless Internet, nanotech--well they're all great, but have you noticed there seems to be a new law roaming around the universe that says if something is due, past due or should have been done yesterday, every piece of technology will malfunction at precisely the WORST moment?

You WILL get the blue screen of death on the last question of your timed online midterm--with a mere 30 seconds to finish without penalty. Your printer WILL go offline and/or run out of ink 20 minutes before your 40-page thesis is due (which you have, of course, waited until the last second to print b/c you, of course, waited until the last second to write it and have only finished cranking that baby out a short 45-minute nap ago). Or, and this is the worst, your flash drive WILL REFUSE to work b/c you have neglected to keep that handy dandy protective cap on it and some infinitesimal micro-something-or-other-made-of-silica is now malfunctioning. Yes. That is the worst. All that information sitting right there in your hand and you can't access it. IT IS. THE WORST. EVER.

To the tech-heads and those obsessed with linear progress in the universe, I may be way out of line, but maybe--just maybe--we all need to get a bit old school about life and go back to a more tangible existence, rather than continue to feed the arms race into the invisible, the incalculable, the ineffable.

Maybe.

Or maybe I should just go ahead, sell my soul for an iPhone and be done with it .

Do you really think you can "spike" on my ass? Really?

2007-08-23T17:28:00.000-04:00

Winthrop's first annual Sweet Elite Has-Been Athlete Reunion was a complete success. I arrived home sandy, sun-burned and sweaty Saturday night from my first volleyball outing in about a year to a living room packed full of boys watching Beckham. And I'm not kidding you, the soccer channel was on THE ENTIRE WEEKEND, wake or sleep. They were only too happy to engage in an orgy of soccer, beer and belching. I, on the other hand, missed the Blake-Federer final of the Cincinnati Open due to their futbol bender.

Janette (our temporary roommate, fellow Big South Intern and vballer) concurs that it was definitely a bit much.

But I would be lying through my freshly whitened teeth if I tried to say that having so many people around our place wasn't satisfying.

We felt loved. We felt popular. Like we are the cool kids living in the big city.

Well, at least a city bigger than Rock Hill, South Carolina.

Back to Janette. Man, that copper Chevy coup pulled up in my driveway just in time. Finally! Another set of XX chromosomes set at the office. The boys were driving me nuts, God bless em'. Just too many fake golf swings every time you try and have a conversation. And too many boasts about how they would sooooooooooooooooo spike on my ass if we ever played volleyball.

Right. I was the starting Libero (i.e. the most bad-ass defender on a team) at a top 30 division I school, made the all-conference team, went to the NCAAs every year and you are going to spike on my ass? I don't think so. Give yourself a reality check and admit that you will not beat me at my game unless you actually played it. Especially if you weren't an athlete.

And who even says "spike" anymore? Is it 1990? Have I just mistakenly fast-forwarded my personal reality 17 1/2 years?

I'm just saying...

Approaching Loserdom.....NOW

2007-08-17T22:58:00.000-04:00

I am officially a loser. I turned down two invitations to go out and see people in a non-work atmosphere, so that I could stay home and whiten my teeth (my love for anything and everything coffee has made this more and more necessary in order to not look like I have constantly just eaten a yellow lollipop) and watch the James Blake tennis matches that I dvr'ed (God I love that little gadget, I've got yoga and power kickboxing programed in at 1 am tonight so I can do them in my living room tomorrow morning. And while this might seem overenthusiastic to most, I'll stand by my assessment that dvr is really pretty freakin' awesome in my book).

In case you're wondering Blake won both matches. Fabulously. FINALLY. I am hoping he is back and ready to take New York by storm. Still bummed that my intern salary will not afford me going up there to visit Sameer and catch a few rounds, but I've got dvr now, so at least I can watch all the matches. It's a small comfort.

I am also playing real volleyball for the first time in for-eva-eva tomorrow and I. AM. PUMPED.
It has been shamefully too long since I've been on a court--hardwood or sand. So hopefully that age-old adage about remembering how to ride a bike will apply to serving, digging, passing and shot making. Thank God it's three's and I don't have to worry about blocking or hitting. Let the tall people jump around like they are "the (wo)man" and then I'll sneak in and take away their glory with one little arm--shot out from my body at the very last second and angled just so, sending the Baden directly to the setter, only to result in my own tall people slamming it in the other team's face.

I've been visualizing. Can you tell?

Last Train Has Left The Station...What a downer

2007-08-15T17:12:00.000-04:00

July was my last National SAAC meeting. I'm more than a little bummed that this part of my life journey is done. But I'll get over it. Just so long as there's a reunion in Cancun soon!
Some shots from our community service at the nations largest homeless shelter in Washington D.C. and from our abysmal kickball outing...I don't want to talk about it.

Stubborn streaks that run in families make it hard to stop sweating the small stuff--but I'm still gonna try. That's how stubborn I am.

2007-08-15T16:51:00.000-04:00

Stupid Lottery. I suppose my chances were slim to none, but I really felt like I was owed some good fortune after the week I had. Obviously I didn't have the golden ticket, but neither did anyone else, so better luck next week. Actually, better luck this week--THANK GOD!!! The insurance is being wonderful. My claims' adjuster is not your stereotypical cold bottom-line-only-focused shrew. Rather she was sympathetic and pulled through for me in a big way. There is no chance on this earth--short of winning the lottery or inheriting money from a mysterious source--that I could have come up with $3500 to replace everything that was taken.

We have a new roomie from Pittsburg and of course Meg knows her. I swear, that girl knows the entire population of Pennsylvania and probably half of Atlanta. Janette will only be crashing temporarily at chez BethBethMichael et Will, but I am looking forward to having another volleyballer around the house and the office. I hope she doesn't mind sleeping on a couch and working in a file room! Ahhhhhh, the life of an intern!

Before I jot off, I just have to give a little shout out to my Grandpa Earl. He died one year ago yesterday and it's been a rough one for us all. I usually do well coming to terms with this fact, but every once in a while, I'll find myself crying in traffic for no good reason other than I just miss him like hell.

Damn it! You got me again.

I had rough weekend and I couldn't figure why I was so touchy. I was seriously freaking out about the dumbest things. I got mad at Will for asking when the Internet would get hooked up and if everybody that I've yelled at driving in the past week could have heard me, I'd probably be in the hospital from all the beat downs that would have come my way. But I think I was really just suffering all over again from a broken-heart and unwilling to admit that I'm still not over the fact that he is gone.

So Grandpa--just remember that I will always remember. You are--as Nat and Natalie so aptly put it--unforgettable. I still look to you when I'm freaking out and sweating it. I still remember how hard you worked to make others happy and when I just can't get over myself I remember the selfless example you set and follow it--though sometimes I'm a little pouty about it. I know that's the kind of person I'd rather be any and every day.

I'll keep trying not to sweat the small stuff. You just keep coming in and making me cry. It kind of feels good actually.Because even though it hurts, I'm still thinking of you. And that brings me the kind of joy that no pain can stand up to.

Love you much!

B

I have the worst luck ever, but I still bought a lottery ticket this week!

2007-08-10T14:19:00.000-04:00

Um, I think I might be cursed? Otherwise, I just cannot explain the rout of rotten luck I have had lately. In addition to being robbed last Saturday, last night I spent two hours in the Shell Station on Sharon and Fairview after my jeep started leaking antifreeze in the Nordstrom parking lot at South Park b/c it's 100+ degrees here and evidently cars don't like that. Especially ones that would be old enough to consume alcohol were they human beings. Needless to say, despite becoming bosom buddies with the Turkish attendant who let me sit behind the counter and chill with him in the air conditioning, it wasn't my first choice of where or how to spend my evening. Seriously now. What are the odds of all this BS happening at once?

As Ms.McGrane would put it,"I am sooooooooooo over it!"

And I am. Over it. Determined not to let it make me bitter or negative. Grandpa Earl always advised us to "not sweat the small stuff" and thank God some of that attitude has stuck with me. I'll roll with the punches, but punch back if I have to. Right about now, I feel like punching the evil twin of Lady Luck, the three fates and whatever evil spirits are kicking it around my life sphere, in the face.

HI YA!!! BACK OFF NOW!!!

Little do they know I have a black belt in kicking negativity in the ass and silver linings are attracted to my presence like kids to a mess.

I even bought a lottery ticket last night, just cause.

My mantra this week: "Tell the negative committee that meets in the back of your head to sit down and shut up!"

2007-08-06T16:13:00.000-04:00

Sorry grandma, there will be no photo of my lovely burglarized house for some time. Yes. I did say burglarized. Yes. I am quite angry about it. Yes we are having the locks re-keyed and asking for a security system. The police and the crime scene people already came by. No forced entry. Probably somebody who did work on the house and made a copy of the key so that the second we moved in and happened to leave--they could come and ruin our otherwise very happy day.

I don't feel violated, just annoyed that I get to deal with all of this. There are certainly worse things that happen in life, but right now this is the worst. I have no laptop, no camera, no iPod. And Irony just won't stop throwing punches.

Exhibit A: Roommate Will has had a streak of bad electronics luck. I jokingly told him that he'd better not bring his curse into to our house. Ha ha on me. Curse came, saw and conquered.

Exhibit B: Kept saying how much I wanted a new computer...guess I'm going to get it! Weeks of insurance paperwork and negotiations later with a hopeful outcome of reembursment

Exhibit C: No sooner are my camera and laptop wretched away from me then do I receive several offers to do freelance work--for which I really need both. Thank God Jennie is a wonderful friend and is going to let me borrow her SLR. I'm promising not to take it back to the house though--ever. No need to bring the curse on her!

Exhibit D: Nice police woman who dusted for fingerprints, just like on CSI (except--and no offense meant to her--she was no where near as good looking as Gary Dourdan), said that in the four years that she had worked our area, she'd never once heard of a break-in in our neighborhood. Just our luck, eh.

So, sorry grandma. No picture of my lovely burgled house. But I promise it will be the first picture I take with my new camera. The second being of our shiny new locks and the third of the panel to the security system--which will probably never be needed again once we get it. How do I know this? I know irony on a close personal level and I know that irony won't be able to resist the delicious temptation for one more good laugh at us over this one.

Newest Article

2007-08-01T13:07:00.001-04:00

P.S. Check out my latest article for the NCAA News!!!

Here's the link!

http://www.ncaa.org/wps/portal/!ut/p/kcxml/04_Sj9SPykssy0xPLMnMz0vM0Y_QjzKLN4g3NPUESYGYxqb6kWhCjhgihqYeCDFfj_zcVKBMpDlQwNTIQz8qJzU9MblSP1jfWz9AvyA3NDSiPN8RANobkoo!/delta/base64xml/L3dJdyEvd0ZNQUFzQUsvNElVRS82XzBfMTVL?WCM_GLOBAL_CONTEXT=/wps/wcm/connect/NCAA/NCAA+News/NCAA+News+Online/2007/Association-wide/Unsporting+conduct+-+07-30-07+NCAA+News

I'm a Big Kid Now...

2007-08-01T11:44:00.000-04:00

I think my big girlness has reached a whole new level. I have a house. After two weekends on the road and an 80-hour work week, I moved myself from Rock Hill, SC up the road to the "Big City." No, not New York (I WISH!!!). During rush hour I yearn for NYC's subway system. Nope, Charlotte is it for me right now. And after 6 trips back and forth with a loaded Jeep, I am done with carrying boxes for more than a while.

Though not done with unpacking them. Our entire first floor is stuffed with the stuff of three human beings and we need to make room for the stuff of one more. Which means Mikey and I have a lot of work to do before the weekend. Looks like that nap I was going to take after work is looking less and less likely!

I miss naps so very badly. Why, oh why, didn't I take advantage of them when they were mandatory in kindergarten??? I have promised myself at least an hour of bliss on Saturday and it's pretty much my motivation to get through the week. I'm still getting back into "40-hours+ work-week" shape and the conditioning regimen is kicking my ass.

Still, I'm determined. And I've got to get there soon, so I can pick up a second job and make some extra $$$.

Wish me luck!

To All Those Who Have Been Waiting A Month For Me To Return Their Phone Call

2007-07-26T15:09:00.000-04:00

Alright. After getting called out by my dad (who I haven't quite convinced to start a blog of his own for philosophical ranting, musing and digressing) for not updating my own blog in quite some time, I've made the executive decision to provide an update on the life and times of yours truly.

I've been working at the Big South Conference for almost a month now. In between learning how to use the fancy telephone, copy machine and actually waking up/get out the door on-time again, I've found a house and housemates. I'm officially becoming a resident of North Cack-a-lack on Tuesday, the thirty-first day of July, this year of our lord, two thousand and seven. I have to admit, I am more than a little heartbroken to give up my valid-without-photo Oregon ID. Though getting pick-pocketed and having to deal with the always rude TSA agents and annoyed bartenders (who never seem satisfied with a government ID sans photo) is not exactly my idea of FUN, it's been a conversation starter--even before I lost the original. I guess my nostalgia is born out of the feeling that this is the last marker of the end of an era for me. I am no longer a kid--which I understood, but am realizing fully only now.

I have an adult job. I have to pay taxes and bills. And damn it, I can't take naps anymore except on Saturdays. But I am also excited about moving to a new city--even if it is only 30 minutes up the road. I'm looking forward to being a young professional and to taking advantage of all the opportunities and challenges that come with this status. Hopefully one of those opportunities will allow me to continue to tell the stories that matter in this world; to give a voice to those who are lacking; to do something that makes a positive difference to our tiny speck of planet that still means the world to those who call it home.

I hope you are also doing well in your worlds. Here's to plotting collision courses and bosom-buddy reunions.

Too Much of a Good Thing is Never Enough

2007-06-29T14:08:00.001-04:00

Today is a good day. It is the first truly good day of year 23. Why, you politely ask? I got a job today. Ahhhhhhhh. I can feel a pretty large amount of that stress (which has been eating away at my peace and contented state of being for some time now, despite lots yoga and running and healthy doses of temporary denial) dissipating, evaporating and getting gone so-to-speak. And you, my friends, you are looking at the newest Big South Intern! Well, you are reading her words at least (If you are looking at me without my knowledge, please stop. It's creepy). Now if I can just get a part-time gig working with some sort of writing entity--newspapers, online newspapers, magazines holla at your girl--I will probably be one of the happier people you know in your life circles. I'm already coasting at "elated" for the time-being. Hopefully nothing else wonderful happens today, or else I will be in danger of bursting into a million little pieces of joy that just couldn't contain itself inside of me...

OK, that's a lie. I'll take all the good I can get. Mae West was mostly right when she said, "Too much of a good thing is never enough." Right now it's definitely enough. We'll see about tomorrow.

Zeus is letting loose!

2007-06-26T19:47:00.000-04:00

We've been having some mad crazy thunder n' lightening storms down here, so you know I've been ecstatic. Like a kid in a candy store, but I can't touch anything. I keep doing the "it's not fair" dance in my mind. And I know you're not really supposed to be outside during these things, but I couldn't help myself the other night when we got a rager. Freaked my roommate and her boyfriend out when I came tearing through the living room at midnight with my Olympus and the look of a mad scientist whose seen Frankenstein outside the window on my face. That baby lasted TWO HOURS!!! Granted, I only got a few minutes to shoot before the blankets of warm southern rain came pelting down and my instincts told me that my SLR wasn't going to fare well--but I did manage to get one lonely shot with a lightening bolt in it. I was pretty damn proud of myself...believe me, it's harder than it looks. I'm just hoping the next week brings more storms, so I can get in some practice.

This was just something cool I did with the streetlight, while waiting for the next flash of lightening to hit.

God Bless Starbucks

2007-06-20T18:02:00.000-04:00

Ethanol? Yuck. Who wants to run off of nasty tasting alcohol compounds? Nope. It's espresso for me! My fuel of choice: A venti non-fat no-whip mocha. It's $4.00 and counting...but seriously worth every penny!

Static Electricity

2007-06-18T17:46:00.000-04:00

Almost everyday I drive by this work site at the top of a hill that overlooks the Catawba River. Almost everyday I promise myself that I am going to take photos at sunset of the electricity towers that are only visible while they work on this project. I finally did it the other day. Comments and Critique welcome...

Is 23 All It's Cracked Up To Be? The Verdict Is Still Out On This One...

2007-06-18T16:40:00.000-04:00

I'm 23 now. For the first time in my short life I can answer affirmatively to the question: Do you feel any different in your new ripe-old age? I'm not yet sure why 23 seems so much older, holds so much more emotional impact and sends my heart rate into overdrive. I think it might have something to do with having no clue where my life is going beyond July 31 and knowing that every choice I make now could mean the difference between writing alongside Maureen Dowd and getting stuck somewhere along the way. Yet, as soon as I work myself up over the seriousness of each new, pressing decision, my inner rebel kicks in its two-cents: Why the hell do you want to follow a safe, conventional path? BORING!!! UNFULFILLING!!!

So I'm in limbo. Looking for summer work and a new roommate. Looking for direction and inspiration. Trying to gain real and valuable journalistic experience, but also savoring every moment at my pool before I become too entrenched in real-world shackles.

It's been 11 days into my love/hate relationship with 23 and though I feel like it's too early to call this one...it might be a tougher year than I've expected. That being said, it will probably be more profound. It will probably yield remarkable identity discoveries. It will probably be worth it. Wait...rewind. It will definitely be worth it.

Round One of The NH Presidential Debates Doesn't Disappoint

2007-06-03T21:53:00.000-04:00

Whew. I’m worn out from the two hours I just spent trying to watch to the New Hampshire Democratic Presidential Debate AND pay attention to the media and blogger commentary online. For once in my life I was begging for a commercial break.

The wait was worth it. The only critique I can offer concerns inequity of time each candidate received to use his or her voice. Still, it was overall the best presidential debate I’ve seen in my young life (the first I can remember being the 1992 debates that I watched with my dad). Elizabeth Edwards said quite eloquently to Larry King that the American people finally got the give and take interaction and honest answers about policy that they are deserving of. Also noted was that the audience questions were a great touch of democracy to the whole process. I couldn’t agree more and that’s what brings me to the topic I’d like to throw out to the wolves. We, of course, heard about Iraq and Iran, immigration, oil prices, the deficit and health care. But something that peaked my own interest—as a college-age voter—was a question posed by a young man about mandatory service in the armed forces.

The candidate response was interesting to say the least. None of the candidates seemed keen on reinstating the draft or on requiring mandatory service, but both Chris Dodd and Mike Gravel commented that using service in the armed forces and community service organizations could be a catalyst for a two-way relationship between college students and the U.S. Government in terms of financing higher education.

Mike Gravel proposed that every year of service in organizations like the Peace Corps, AmeriCorps or in a branch of the armed services could bring fours years of paid education. This started a conversation that touched on the struggle middle-class families are facing in financing college educations deemed so necessary for success these days, on the scandals involving student loan providers and the rising price vs. the quality of state education.

I really liked the values that Chris Dodd put forth about the fleecing of American families in the education racket and some creative ways to finance higher education while at the same time getting the so-called “Generation Entitlement” to earn the privilege of an American college degree through service to others.

Though it could be called minor, this issue really hit home for me. The preparation of future generations directly contributes to the quality of this nation. We can’t expect to get something out of nothing in terms of a skilled and educated labor force. Education has been at the core of American values since the days of the American Revolution and if we want to re-build upon the strengths of American values then we must re-invest in our youth.

But what do the other bloggers think? What issue hit home for you and who answered to it best? Readers: Don’t hold those comments back! If we want to have a real discussion about the future of this nation, we need debate and dissent!

Ohhhh The Drama!!!

2007-04-03T20:54:00.000-04:00

If the 2008 presidential race keeps up its current level of drama, the nightly news may out do Grey's Anatomy for juiciest content on evening television.

Tonight's top story: A new poll by the University of New Hampshire shows that despite Hillary Clinton's impressive fundraising capabilities, former White House wannabes John Edwards and Al Gore have stolen quite a few points from her early lead in the race for the Democratic nomination. Edwards has edged into second place just behind Clinton and Gore (who STILL isn't running) has actually gained points consistently since the race began.

Edwards is dangerous. Although I don't think he's going to get many votes because of his wife's battle with cancer, I do believe that her willingness to be public about the their situation made people remember he was running in the midst of the Hillary-Obama drama. And he needed that attention. His strategy of laying low while Hillary and Obama beat the crap out of each other through the media was starting to hurt him, because people forgot he was an option. But over the past few weeks, his numbers are up and he's right back in it--with people actually listening.

In 2000, Al Gore as a presidential candidate was seen by a lot of democrats as a kind of settlement. We voted for him, because he was the lesser of two evils and because he had White House experience with a president that most of us saw as very successful. Still--he was known in more than a few circles as Al "the bore" Gore. He didn't seem to have any zest, though Tipper's skills on the drums gave a minute hint that something could be hiding behind his monotone daily address.

An Oscar winning documentary later and suddenly he's the most interesting person in politics with a thriving "Mickey Mouse" candidacy on the democratic roster. He was actually hilarious on Jay Leno. I was rolling on the ground laughing with him instead of at him--and I couldn't believe it. Could we have misjudged him 8 years ago?

11 percent of Democrats sampled in New Hampshire (+ or - 5 points) seem to think so although he STILL ISN'T on the ballot (I honestly can't get over it). Even the conservative Christians (many of whom have decided that being "green" is no longer a heathen hippie thing to do and rather a service to God's creation) are giving the man props for his work in bringing awareness to what the White House still describes as a naturally based phenomenon that shouldn't worry us in the least, and most all scientists describe as most certainly aggravated by humankind's irresponsible pollution of the land, air and sea. Who would have EVER thought that Global warming might be the issue that actually brings people in this nation together? And wouldn't it be crazy--ridiculous even-- if it brought them together over Al Gore as a nominee? I might have to eat my hat.

Third Party Candidate's The Charm?

2007-03-07T21:15:00.000-05:00

Republican this. Democrat that. Back and forth. Tit for tat. It’s enough to make one wish they were born blind to the colors red and blue. Just give us some yellow or green for a change please.

Each day that passes in this political firestorm, I am more convinced that many Americans would act outrageously and vote against their parties-formally-known-as-sacred if somebody—anybody—would just step up and A) look at this nation holistically; beyond so-called red and blue interests B) operate in a straightforward manner and C) act with some freakin’ integrity. I certainly would. That being said, I believe the rise of an Independent candidate out of the primaries is not only possible, but also extremely probable.

Under traditional American political theology, an Independent candidate with a realistic shot at the White House is almost unfathomable. Especially with more than 70 years of very polarized politics behind us. However, I think Vicki may be right about Republicans seeking out alternative options this go around. That person may be found in a Democratic candidate who runs a family values oriented campaign, but truth-be-told, I believe the more likely scenario we will see is the second place finisher in a close primary going Independent and running the line down the middle. If our current political environment holds, this plan just might be audacious enough to work.

For example: John McCain, who despite his stance on the Iraq War, is very respected by right-leaning Democrats and Independents because he has traditionally distanced himself from extreme conservatism. Let’s say he gets edged out in the Republican primaries again. Depending on how he plays his cards with an Iraq strategy, he could very well steal the entire moderate vote out from under the Democratic and Republican nominees.

From the other side of the aisle, a dangerous Independent candidate could be found in Barack Obama. He is the single most dynamic candidate of this election thus far. Democratic candidates are scrambling to kill the Obama buzz and Republicans are simply scared as hell of him. If he continues to win respect from both sides of the aisle by walking his ethical talk, but loses out to another Democrat because of that nagging lack of experience, that Independent option could be the worst nightmare of the Democratic candidate who beats him.

The possibility of a “real” third choice in the 2008 general election may be dangerously optimistic, but I just can’t stop myself from dreaming up the various line-ups we could see. I keep saying to myself: Oh the possibilities! But cover my bases by also issuing a silent prayer: Please, oh please let one of them be a person I can actually feel good voting for…

Rookie of the Year

2007-02-24T11:31:00.001-05:00

Being the president of the so-called "free world" is hard. Gray-hair growing, ulcer and heart attack-inducing, assassination-attempt-lurking around every corner, hard. Yet as election time grows near, there is a predictably optimistic assemblage of American-born politicians over the age of 35 who still think they are up for the job.

This year is no different. But an interesting phenomenon is occurring: The profiles of the most viable candidates are more diverse than we have ever seen before. It seems that diversity is leveling the playing field and, in a reflection of American culture, giving Americans a pool of candidates who truly represent the broad differences in our population. But more choices on the primary ballot won't make figuring out whose name to fill in on your ballot any easier.

Since the mid-term elections way back in November 2006, I've had to keep CNN on 24/7 and check The New York Times Online almost hourly just to keep up with the flurry of pre-primary election activity. As far as I can tell, the 2004 Bush v. Kerry match-up will seem absolutely boring in comparison to Hillary v. Obama or Giuliani v. Romney v. McCain. "America's Mayor" Rudy Giuliani, from New York City, hasn't even formally declared his candidacy and yet political know-it-alls from both sides of the aisle are already weighing in on his viability as a general electorate candidate.

One has to wonder why this year is suddenly more competitive than 2000 or 2004, but the answer is really quite simple: The White House is effectively up for grabs. Despite a slight advantage currently held by the newly empowered Democrats due to negative public sentiment over the war in Iraq, social security woes and a fragile economy; they have yet to prove that anybody from their party would actually do a better job in real and measurable terms. Moreso every single candidate, regardless of their party affiliation, has an uphill battle ahead within their own party and in the general electorate.

Hillary is a woman. Obama is black-or perhaps not black enough. McCain refuses to regret his support of the war in Iraq. Rudy Giuliani has never held a national office. Mitt Romney is-gasp-Mormon.

Read the list again. There can be no doubt that each candidate faces a strong social stigma, but this struggle might just produce the best political climate that American voters have seen in a long time. None of these politicians can merely rely on good looks and pretty words. Each will be forced to defend their ideas and values, create good policy and answer tough questions. There won't be any pre-screening audience inquiries in this race, at least not if that candidate wants to win.

This race is all about answering the tough questions that have been evaded for the past eight years. The result will hopefully be what American democracy is all about: Getting the best qualified and most deserving candidate into office. That is, somebody who appreciates where they are, how they got there, and who understands the privilege and responsibility that come with serving the American people.

Looking at the big picture, it is almost impossible for the next president of the United States to not break at least one of the previously mentioned barriers to political success. But is America ready for a female/black/Mormon/independent party president? I don't know, but we'd better get there by November.